Can't wait to get out of the southwest.

In the past decade, I've lived in many parts of the country, and each was so different.

I became a soldier, and a land surveyor, in the Ozarks. The mountains were beautiful, the grass was green, and in the winter, the snow was fun to play in. Hammering surveyor's stakes into the rocky, frozen ground, made me strong, and road marching up and down the hills through all kinds of weather built strong character, taught me that I can do anything I really am determined to do, and are among my most cherished memories.

I served in a Combat Heavy line company in Central Texas. It was among the most beautiful places I have seen. It wasn't as green as Missouri, nor as hilly, but creeks and rivers cut through the small hills, and there were lakes to spend weekends at with friends. There were springs, and trees to swing off of from a rope. It was close enough to Mexico to have really good food, and that it was handy to speak Spanish, but far enough away from the border that it still felt like the United States.

Then there was Georgia, which was 10x as green as Missouri, with tall pines and cypruses, and swamps that bloomed in every color imaginable in the spring time. Sure, we were an hour from anything, but the drive there wasn't bad. We could drive through the crop fields to Vidalia, down the coastline to Brunswick, or through the swamps and salt flats to Savannah. It was very Old South, which could get difficult at times for an interracial couple, but mostly, it was an easy place to live after we got used to the horrible duty assignment that Ft. Stewart is.

Then we moved here. This is a cool place to visit, but after being here for a month or so, it's just brown, and ugly, and depressing. We are in a big city, but if we have to do anything in another city, we are at least four hours away from the nearest. For a big city, El Paso has very little because it's so poor, and for many products or services, the only way to get them is to go to Odessa, Midland, or Lubbock. They are 4, 5, and 5 hours from here, respectively. It's not just the drive that's prohibitive, but what the drive consists of. It's not like there's civilization anywhere along the way. It's like you drive 4-5 hours through the desert, amid absolutely nothing, and you better fill up with gas before leaving town, bring plenty of food and water, and hope nobody has to go to the bathroom, and if they do, you better hope it's not warm enough for rattle snakes to be out, because there's nothing but roadside, desert, cactus, and joshua trees as far as the eye can see. It's depressing. It makes you not want to go anywhere, because everywhere you go is a million miles away, and the route there is all the same... rocky, desolate, and brown.

Yesterday, we went and got Thak's motorcycle in Lamesa, which is right between Odessa and Lubbock. Northwest Texas is pretty. It's plains, more midwestern than anything... small towns along the way, dotted with the occasional oil field, and oil millionaire's mansion. Aside from the oil, it's very Wizard of Oz. If there were a way to transplant Ft. Bliss to Lubbock, we'd do it in a heartbeat.

It's nice to go to other parts of Texas, which actually feel like the US, and NOT the southwest. It is extremely hard to go back home after being back in the US again for the day. It's nice to hear English spoken in an American accent, and seeing women who wear clothes that fit, and don't shave their eyebrows off and draw them with a pencil the way southwestern women do. It's nice to see white people. That may sound racist, but literally, 9 days out of 10, the only way I see a white person is to look in the mirror. It's nice to see only models of cars sold in America, and to share the roads with people who learned to drive in this country, and don't act like complete idiots behind the wheel. Not seeing a single Mexico license plate all day long is awfully nice, and only someone who's lived on the border for a while can truly appreciate that.

This may be the one place I have truly been counting the days until we leave. Ft. Stewart was a bad assignment because of the nature of the mission, and the post itself, but Georgia wasn't a bad place to live. If we could have lived there minus the constant deployments to the most God-forsaken places on the planet, and the crappy housing policies, then it would have been great. I have hated duty stations, but never the PLACE itself, until we came here. Ft. Bliss is actually not a bad duty station, or it wouldn't be, were it not located in the deepest pit of hell.

We only have a little over a year until we're done here. We discussed what it would take for us to stay if someone offered Thak a really good job in town, and we really couldn't think of anything that would make it ok to continue living in this land of brown landscape, ugly people, and rudeness. The closest to here I'd ever want to live is Odessa, although Lubbock would be better because Odessa is still really brown. It's at least not as poor as this place because of the oil fields. We're probably not staying in Texas, but our logic is to close no door until we're established in the private sector, so yeah, there's some possibility we may end up in Texas for the long haul. In all honesty, I would hope that it is not west Texas of any variety, though. It's too spread out, too desolate... too brown.

Thak graduates in 15 months, and then we can leave. He's begun pushing for a medical discharge so that he can get out of the Army sooner, then switch to day school instead of nights. If he gets that to happen for him, then we could be out of here before 2010 is out. I can't wait. Every time we have to leave El Paso, and face an all day trip just to go get something in the next town, it just wears down my patience for this shithole just that much more.

Stunning Saturday, one day early

I'm doing Stunning Saturday one day early, since tomorrow, Saturday, we're taking a road trip to pick up Thak's motorcycle, five hours away near Lubbock.

Anyhow, without further ado, today's Stunning Saturday feature is on vintage-inspired, pin-up style clothing!!

The clothes at the mall are mostly boring. The stuff at the vintage stores usually fits funny and is in iffy condition. Designer clothes are expensive. Plus, it seems like those of us in our late-20's are in a weird spot when it comes to fashion. Dressing out of the Juniors' department is ridiculous, but the Misses' clothes mostly would better suit someone 10-20 years older than us. With all this working against us, what are we to do?? Shop retro!! You can't go wrong!

My favorite website for this style of clothing is www.pinupgirlclothing.com . Their prices aren't bad, and everything I've ordered from them (primarily dresses and lingerie) has been excellent quality, and looks great! The best part about this site is that if you're anywhere but the west coast, you'll probably be the only one in your city with whatever items you get from there! The site, I'd say, is well-known enough that it's hard to get certain sizes but still obscure enough that you are nearly guaranteed not to be one of three at the party with the same dress.

{{Tip on getting your size: If you're like me, and need an X-Small, your best bet is to get in before each season and pre-order your stuff! The X-Smalls sell out fastest!! This goes 100 times for swimwear. It seems like the bigger sizes stick around quite a bit longer, but X-Small-Medium need to at minimum, follow the brand's official information on Twitter or Facebook so that you can order on the first day that the new season's stuff is released, and at least consider pre-ordering. If you don't, you may end up on a waiting list, and never get what you want. This is the story of my life with swimwear. I should take my own advice sometime, really... I'm just too indecisive to commit to just one swimsuit because they're all so great. Oh, and the size chart runs big. By the chart, I'm between XS and S, but an XS is almost too big for me. Order the smallest size you think you can wear, and God help you if you're thinner than I am.}}

Now, let's talk about shoes. I do not generally buy shoes from this or any retro site, because most of them are available other places for far cheaper. In fact, the red shoes that go with my two favorite Pin-up Couture dresses, I got at Target, on close-out sale, for about $8 three years ago. An identical pair of shoes sells for $45 on the site. Nobody can tell that my shoes are cheap, or that they are half a size too big (hey, if you are paying $8 for shoes, you can't be choosy!) I get countless compliments on them. My black shoes (no, not my BCBG stilettos) that go with some other things I have from there, I got on sale at Macy's for about $30. The nearly identical pair on that site was listed at $120. It pays to look around for shoes before shelling out the money for the ones from the site. Sometimes you can't avoid it, and that's really the only place you can get what you're looking for, but many times, there are other, far cheaper, options.

The really cool thing about this style of clothing is that just about anyone can wear it. Yes, the fabrics can be unforgiving, but that is nothing a waist cincher can't help you with. The fact is, they sell these dresses in sizes XS-2XL, and in my honest opinion, they look equally good in every size. The only truly important thing is to have a very nice waist, and again, if nature didn't hook you up with that biologically preferred .70 waist/hip ratio, Frederick's of Hollywood certainly can.

The bottom line is that anyone can wear this style of clothing, and have fun with it! Pin-up is hot these days. Things that were old are new again. Especially for military wives or girlfriends, what could ever be better than channeling the pin-up style of wars past, but in our own new way? Give it a try! It'll make you want to plant a Victory Garden, and go meatless on Mondays!!

Now, here are two of my favorite Pin-up Couture dresses:

BIIIIIG Texas rainbows!! This one went all the way to the ground on both sides, pretty much spanned our neighborhood. It was a double on one side. Look hard at the second photo, and you'll see that there are actually two rainbows there.

My husband bought WHAT??

Thak bought a motorcycle. It is a 1985 Honda Shadow 1100VT. He's wanted one like this forever, and he got it for a really good price. It's right here in West Texas, too. We have to go pick it up next weekend.

It'll pay for itself in 3-4 months with how much gas we'll save (when you normally drive a Dodge Ram, and then switch to a motorcycle, the difference in fuel expenditure is drastic!) and as long as he promises to NEVER EVER ride it on the freeway, or in rain or sandstorms, then it doesn't freak me out too badly. It's a nice bike, fits Thak great... it's like the ultimate in Asian redneck awesomeness.

The pic isn't our exact bike, but it's identical to it.

A bed for Orren.

I noticed yesterday that Orren has gotten too tall for his crib. He climbs everything that's chest height for him or lower, and I noticed that the crib rail was right about chest height for him yesterday when he woke up from his nap. It was only a matter of time before he would climb out of his crib and get hurt. The mattress was set on the lowest notch, and the side was up as high as it would go, so there was no prolonging the crib use even though 13 months is very early for him to start sleeping in a bed.

Today we went to a local mattress store, and bought him a nice firm twin sized set, and then some cute bedding from Target, along with a rail. He's sleeping in his big boy bed now, went down without a problem. He's ready for his big bed. He looks tiny in it, though. I can't believe how fast he's growing up.

Here's a pic of Orren's room with his big boy bed. Those who have seen his room in person will notice that we switched his bed and dresser. It was Thak's idea, but I think it's nice this way, too.

Stunning Saturday: first one

My friends are always telling me that I know the best stuff. Personally, after spending nearly five years in backwoods Georgia, and now the past year in desert bordertown hell, I can feel my coolness slipping by the day, but hey, as long as people are still asking me for the latest trends and tips on the hottest gear/shoes/drinks/songs, I guess I haven't completely succumbed to the suck. So here's a new idea. So many bloggers have "Works for me Wednesday", or similar things, so I'm trying out "Stunning Saturday" (or as Thak would say, "Studly Saturday" if any of it pertains to Orren), in which I'll share a tip for something I find completely awesome.

Today's Stunning Saturday feature is on cloth diapering, specifically, how to get started if you're on a budget! Cloth diapering is so hip these days. How can it not be? Gen Y makes covers so fun and stylish that they would make even the most die hard disposable diaperer convert in a hurry. Bum Genius makes diapers so easy that even daycares are willing to use them. The diapering options are limitless, and pretty freaking amazing, and it's all because it's become very popular among parents in the know, especially in major cities. It's very fair to say that cloth diapering isn't just for po' folks and hippies anymore.

As the lone cloth diapering mom among my friends, I'm always asked how much it cost to get into it. I hate answering that question because I own about 8 dozen diapers, 3 dozen of which are ridiculously expensive. In all honesty, someone could get into cloth diapering for a fraction of what I spent (which, I will reiterate, is still drastically less than what disposables would have cost!) Thak was deployed and past the 12 month mark when I bought most of our diapers, so we were not really on a budget when we bought ours. At our new post, a great many people do not deploy, and those who do certainly don't do it much, so the cost of getting started in cloth diapering is prohibitive to some. This is totally understandable, and it's not a reason not to use cloth. There are budget-friendly ways to get started!!

The easiest and cheapest way, I'd say, is to buy used. Let's get it clear right now that used cloth diapers are not nasty. They come clean after every use, the majority of stains will bleach out just by putting it in the sun for a day, and there is really absolutely nothing nastier about buying used cloth diapers than buying used baby clothes at your local children's consignment. There. Now you know. Used dipes are good. I would say the best way in which they're good is price. If you go on diaperswappers.com, the best-known site for used cloth diaper exchange (buy, sell, trade), it is common to see very elite brands of pocket diapers which retail for as much as $35 per diaper, listed there, gently used (looks new to me!) for $5-10. The more mid-grade brands, which maybe retail for $20 per diaper, are even cheaper.

There is also Craigslist. This is kind of a shot in the dark, but I have found some truly great deals on there. In fact, I found one right here on my side of El Paso just this morning. If I needed any more diapers, I'd have jumped right on this deal. It was a mom whose babies were done with diapers for good, and she was basically selling off her entire huge collection dirt cheap. This, for a parent who's thinking of getting into cloth, is a goldmine. Granted, there won't be this type of thing on Craigslist every day, but keep looking, and maybe you'll find one! Better yet, place a "wanted" ad, and call all the cloth diapering mommies out of the woodwork to sell you their babies' outgrown dipes at deeply discounted prices!!

The coolest thing about this is that prices are always negotiable. We cloth diapering moms are always very eager to help anyone use cloth, whether they're doing it right from the start, or making the switch somewhere down the line. I've loaned out diapers to friends who were wanting to switch so that they could have some to tide them over while they bought their own collection, or saved up the money to do so. When it comes time to sell my huge collection of diapers (which will probably grow with the next baby, even though I keep telling myself it won't), I can tell you that it will be more important to help someone get into cloth than it will be to make money off of them. Honestly, I'd rather give them away for free to someone who will really use them, and has an actual need for them, than I would to sell them to someone who's iffy. I have found that a great majority of cloth diapering moms are the same way. We want to help you get into cloth, so if the price of something is too high for you to pay, offer what you CAN pay. You might be very pleasantly surprised to find that your offer will be accepted more times than not.

So in short, this week's Stunning Saturday tip is for would-be cloth diapering moms on a tight budget, who feel trapped in the Pampers aisle. Buy used! You'll be a proud cloth diapering mommy in no time flat, and your wallet will thank you.

I leave you with this parting shot of my West Texas clothesline, full Indian cotton prefolds, my own budget-friendly option.

Sharing and mechanical bulls

So we had to have a lesson on sharing today. Orren has been playing chef a lot, grabbing the toy pots and pans, and stirring them around with the toy mixing spoons and ladles. He loves it. It's his new favorite game. Well, there's this one red ladle that he and Erin both love, and Erin has become kind of a bully over it. Whenever Orren has it, she just comes up and snatches it from him. Of course, as one would expect, he screams and does not understand why mean old sissy took his ladle.

Of course, Erin's take on this is that Orren isn't sharing, and he's already had his turn. Fair enough if you're preschool-age or older, but at 13 months, sharing does not exist. Of course, at 6 1/2, understanding does not much exist, and Erin retaliated to being made to give Orren the ladle back, by throwing his favorite book, Touch and Feel Tractor across the room. She was then sent to her room for five minutes, and then once again, snatched the ladle from Orren, and then totally blew off the explanation I gave her of why that still wasn't ok. (OK, so it wasn't ok 5 minutes ago. Why would it be ok now? You think a timeout is advanced payment on a free pass for bullying your baby brother?) Of course, she replied by saying that she hated sharing, that it was the stupidest thing ever, that she didn't want a baby brother anymore, and of course, that it all would be better if we'd just had a girl baby instead of a nasty stinky stupid boy. Gotta love first grade girl logic.

Anyhow, after keeping her off her brother for about 15 more minutes, they've both forgotten about the ladle, and are now playing happily with Legos, and a radio that is driving me nuts (but I'm letting it slide. Even annoying, crappy, polytonic music, reminiscent of cell phone ringtones from 10 years ago is better than the screaming.)


Now, to balance the bad with the good, here's the funny Erin story of the day:

Erin walks into the living room, and asks me straight out of the blue, "Mommy, have you ever ridden a mechanical bull?"

Well.... I was once young, single, and stationed in Texas. Of course, that meant bars, and bars in Texas mean mechanical bulls. So yeah, I've ridden a mechanical bull probably close to 100 times. I freaking love me some mechanical bull!!

I looked at Erin kind of like she was crazy, and said, "Yes, I've ridden a mechanical bull before. Why?"

To which she replied, eyes wide with admiration, "Mommy, that's so cool. I can't believe you rode a mechanical bull!"

I wanted to ask her how she knew what a mechanical bull was, but honestly, I was just kind of liking the fact that she wasn't talking back or having an attitude, so I left it alone. My kid thinks I'm cool because I have ridden a mechanical bull. Unconventional, yes... but I'll take it!

To brag or not to brag

I was accused today, by a person who will remain nameless, of taking Orren's milestones and accomplishments for granted. It was so far out of left field that I didn't even know how to respond. No, I don't brag about every little thing either of my kids does. I HATE when people do that! When something is notable, I tell people about it. I do not, however, feel the need to alert the media every time Orren runs a little faster, throws his football farther, or says more words than he did the day prior. I do share funny stories about the kids (and with Erin in the mix, there are plenty of funny stories!) and silly things that they do, but no, I don't brag it up every time something new happens. Orren is learning so fast that it would be constant if I did that.

I was just really taken aback that this person accused me of not being proud of my kids, when in reality, the reason I make a conscious effort to shut up about my awesome son while around here is because her child is severely developmentally delayed, and while older than Orren, has not mastered things that the average 5-month-old does without thinking. If I'm gonna brag about my 13-month-old getting good at catching his football, or wanting to sit on the potty, or running faster than ever, it is for damned sure not going to be to a person who cannot say for sure if hers will EVER walk or talk. What do I look like? The meanest person alive? Why would I brag to her about my kid who's strong as an ox and smart as can be?

I'm pretty sure nobody wants to hear the truth about what I think of Orren. In reality, I've never seen a kid quite like him. He's stronger, smarter, and more perceptive than any toddler I've ever met in my life. There is something special about that one, and I have a strong feeling that he's going to become great in something. I do not know what it will be that he becomes great at, but I believe he will be well known for his accomplishments someday. So yeah, I'm 100% sure nobody wants to listen to me go on about how I'm pretty sure I'm raising the next Brett Favre or Albert Einstein. That's a really stupid thing to talk to your friends about.

Plus, I realized recently that I was in denial about how great Orren really is because I CANNOT STAND parents who think their kid is gifted. Erin is of average intelligence, and I'm cool with that. She'll probably never be an honor student, and she will probably always struggle academically just as she does now. I'm not ashamed of that fact. As long as she does her best, I'm proud of her. In raising an average kid, I came to realize that the majority of parents are also raising average kids (obviously, right?) but a great many think their kid is a genius even though they're far from it. This annoys me big time. I cannot stand people who think their kids are so much smarter than the average bear, so to speak, when the kid is pretty much dead average. It took Thak mentioning to me multiple times that Orren is so much smarter than any other kid he's ever seen, and watching Orren with other kids his age, for me to really accept and acknowledge that he's probably highly intelligent. I already knew he was very athletic. If you've met Orren, that's undeniable. I never wanted a genius child (it's a hard life for the kid), and if Orren is NOT as highly intelligent as we suspect that he may be, I won't be disappointed, but I refuse to be lumped in with the idiots who insist that their average children are geniuses, so that's why I don't brag about Orren's accomplishments, because he's far ahead of others his age whom we know personally. Why would I rub that in?

It's one of those damned if you do, damned if you don't, situations. If you brag about your kid's every accomplishment, that annoys everyone within a 100 mile radius, and for good reason. Even so, if you only give selective highlights, mostly funny anecdotes, and don't brag much at all about what your kid does, then you're taking them for granted, and couldn't possibly be proud of them. Screw that. It takes a concerted effort to shut up about Orren once in a blue moon. That's how proud I am of him. He's the most wonderful little guy ever. He's my future Minnesota Viking with a degree in Nuclear Physics, and you will never tell me otherwise. I think it's enough that Thak and I believe in him, celebrate his accomplishments, and try to be humble in mixed company. I never thought the very people we sought to protect by being most considerate and NOT shoving our kids' accomplishments in their faces, would bite us in the back for it. Like I said, damned if you do, damned if you don't.

More misunderstanding and poor treatment of female soldiers...

This week's issue of Army Times included a small update on the Ft. Stewart soldier who refused to deploy because she had nobody to care for her son. I was glad to see that she did not get any jail time, but was disappointed that they gave her an administrative discharge under Other than Honorable conditions. That's a pretty nasty discharge, especially when you consider that all she did was refuse to leave her 10-month-old in state custody. Dude, I would NEVER leave my kids under those circumstances, not for all the gold in Ft. Knox, all the tea in China, and all the money in the world! I, for damn sure, would not do it in order to go and sit on a camp in some desert hell because the government decided I needed to.

Again, I don't think this soldier handled this situation well. I think once she knew her family care plan was shaky (and she probably knew it before the baby was born) she should have requested an honorable discharge due to single parenthood. It is a common thing, and if I had a dollar for every person I know who's gotten out that way, I'd have more than a few bucks. I don't think this soldier is very intelligent or rational, because if she were, she'd have gotten out nearly a year ago, taken her honorable discharge, and moved on with her life. That doesn't change the fact that I still think she was taken for a ride by the unit right to the end.

One thing really bothered me in the Army Times article. They said that the Army's investigation had shown that she did not intend to deploy with the unit, and said she would do what she had to in order to get out of it. While there's certainly the possibility that things are exactly as those few words would imply, I would say the odds are far greater that she said something to one of her buddies (and during an investigation, buddies turn on you quicker than anything because they are threatened just as badly as you are!) like, "If they think I'm going to leave my baby in foster care, they're crazy. I'm not deploying if they think that's what I'm going to do." I know quite well how adept the Army is at twisting words, and cannot actually think of one investigation I've been close to in which words were NOT twisted to suit the purposes of some officer hell bent on getting his way. I don't think we'll ever know the whole story, and I am 100% sure that the three paragraphs in Army Times did not tell even a little bit of the truth beyond what type of discharge this soldier is getting. It's just one more example of the Army being extremely secretive with the truth, and vilifying a young female soldier who only wanted what every other mom on the planet wants, to be sure that her child would have the best care while she was working (yeah, in this case, work was a 12 month deployment. This just makes it even more-so.) I will say it again. This soldier had a baby. She did not rob a bank. Let's have some perspective on what's going on here. The Army is punishing a mom for trying to be a mom. As a female veteran and a mom, I am greatly disappointed in my beloved Army.

In that same issue of Army Times, there was a letter from a retired Command Sergeant Major. He was discussing Major General Cucolo's policy on war zone pregnancies. MG Cucolo, the new commander of 3rd Infantry Division (Dear God, please bring back LTG Lynch. This new guy SUCKS by comparison!) said that any soldier who gets pregnant while deployed, and the soldier who gets said soldier pregnant, will face harsh punishment.

First off, contrary to the opinions of naive military wives everywhere, people have sex on deployment. Married soldier couples are allowed to live together while deployed (finally!), and of course single soldiers do what single soldiers have always done. Sure, there are married guys who cheat, too. That's why you don't marry someone you didn't serve with first... Anyhow, I digress. Let's look at the size and scope of this issue. People who support MG C's policy say that pregnant soldiers leaving the combat zone early detract greatly from the mission. I disagree. I think it's a very small problem. In a brigade of nearly 4o00 soldiers, which a previous Army Times article used as an example, there were 12 pregnancies during that brigade's most recent 15 month deployment. 12 in 15 months, out of 4000 soldiers. Yes, that is a giant and widespread problem. Please alert the President. (Rolling eyes.)

More soldiers have to leave the battlefield for injuries resulting from their own stupidity than for pregnancy. Will we also harshly punish the guys who don't use proper safety measures, and injure themselves to the point of not being returned to duty? If we penalize pregnant soldiers, we NEED to penalize those idiots, too, because the number of them, and thus the impact to any unit, is far greater. It's not going to happen, though. They always threaten it, but I've NEVER seen anyone punished for being an idiot and getting hurt.

Anyhow, this CSM who wrote in agreeing with MG C's policy about was so ignorant. He basically said (I'm paraphrasing), "With all the contraceptive measures available these days, there is no excuse. Young soldiers get pregnant intentionally, and it's blatantly disrespectful to the unit and detrimental to the mission."

OK, at face value, that sounds about right. Every military pharmacy on the planet stocks a full supply of every contraceptive known to man, and boy do dependent wives (and daughters) take full advantage! Even married female soldiers can manage to get their hands on some of this stuff... sometimes. For single female soldiers, though, it's nearly impossible. Let me tell you why.

When you need anything medical done that's non-emergency, you go to something called "sick call". Basically, it's open clinic beginning at about 5:30 or 6:00 in the morning. In order to go to sick call, a soldier must go to their unit's duty NCO that morning, fill out a slip detailing WHY they're going, and then present that slip to their Company Commander. He must sign it in order for that soldier to go to sick call. They will not be seen without their Commander's signature, and the Commander will not sign it without the reason being filled out.

You want to be that single female soldier who presents the sick call slip with "contraceptive prescription" in the "reason" block to her Company Commander? Yeah, neither does anyone else. For one, like it's his business. For another, many Company Commanders, like mine, were very religious and would refuse to sign such a slip. And finally, a great many commanders do not want to let anyone go unless it's a total emergency, and he'll always tell you that you can take care of that tomorrow, but tomorrow, he doesn't let you go either.

Now, a civilian girl can go to Planned Parenthood, and get what they need. Try getting your squad leader to release you for that. It won't happen. You don't get to take off work unless the people above you think your reasoning is good, and none of the very married men above us ever think that there's a good reason a young female soldier needs such an appointment. Maybe it's better in units which have more female soldiers, and even females within their command group. Maybe medics, cooks, and quartermasters don't have this issue. I was neither medic, nor cook, nor quartermaster, though. I can only tell you that female engineers find absolutely no understanding or cooperation in a great many cases.

It makes my blood boil when military wives talk about this, too. They act like female soldiers just pop out babies left and right because they don't want to do their job. In reality, our access to contraception is maybe 10% that of anyone who doesn't put on a uniform and combat boots every morning. Any civilian woman in America can easily time her pregnancies by her standards. Female soldiers have to jump through ten flaming hoops to accomplish that same thing. THAT is why so many single soldiers get pregnant. It's not because they are trying to get out of doing their job, or because they are trying to slack off, or anything else. It's because the choices that civilian women take for granted are damned near unavailable.

I'm so tired of the implication that if a female soldier has a baby, she had some malicious intent in doing that. Hell, I'm sick of the widely held belief that if a female soldier does anything but act like a total robot 24/7, that she's in some way wrong.

Try looking nice at a civilian clothes function. You will be accused of trying to steal people's husbands. This accusation usually comes about when you show proper courtesy by greeting your superior. (Why is it normal and expected for civilian girls to spend time on their appearance, but when we wear clothes that fit and let our hair out of its usual regulation military knot, we are wrong?)

Try having a relationship with anyone other than the lowest-ranking, crappiest, fattest, stupidest soldier in the unit. You are social climbing. You're a rank whore. (Why is it ok for civilian girls to have standards, but not us?)

Try getting married to someone you are actually attracted to, meaning in many cases that he is older, established enough to have at least a little bit of rank on him, and he's well-connected enough that he can hold his own in most units. You have just complicated things for yourself BIG TIME, and you must have some ulterior motive. (Why can't we have good men? Can't it be a good thing when we find someone who makes us happy and whom we can be proud of?)

Try having a baby. You are a whore. You want free time off work and those snazzy maternity uniforms that you don't have to pay for (but you turn in after you have the baby). You want to pawn your duties off on the rest of your squad. You are a royal pain in the ass who is definitely up to something. (Can't anyone just say congratulations? It's a baby, not an act of treason.)


We are not allowed to be people. I don't understand why male soldiers are allowed, even expected, to live a very normal life off duty, but when a female soldier tries to do just that, they are maligned until the end of the earth. We have a long way to go before the Army will be a good place for female soldiers. Anyone who thinks things are ok the way they are is quite obviously male, probably Infantry, and definitely extremely ignorant.

New seats!

We got the car seats in today. They are probably the last ones we will ever buy... well, maybe. They are at least the last ones we will buy for at least a few more years.

Our extended harnessing days are over. Erin has just about outgrown the 5-point harness on her seat. She has about half an inch to go before we'll have to remove it and just use her seat as a booster. There is only one seat on the market with higher top harness slots, and they're only higher by an inch, so it wouldn't be worth the $300 price tag for that extra inch since, for all we know, Erin could grow an inch by the time the thing shipped to us, and we'd never even get to use it. For that reason, we bought her the best booster we could find. It's the Sunshine Kids Monterey in red.

I don't like that we're not harnessing anymore. It's bittersweet to move up to a regular booster, because it's widely known that a step up in car seats is a step down in safety. I also know that we gave her the very best for the very longest that we could, and now we're still giving her the very best that we can. No $20 booster from Wal Mart for us. This girl rides in one of the top rated booster seats in the world. As you can see, it has true side impact wings, and is built very sturdy. It is extremely height adjustable (Erin is on the second slot from the bottom), and accommodates kids as big as 120 pounds (yes, I can fit in this booster with room to spare!! But I'm too tall. It only goes up to 5'3".) It is narrow enough to be able to fit in the back seat with two other car seats, even in a compact car like mine. I'm impressed so far. Erin is, too. She'll likely ride in it until she's 12, and then hand it down to Orren. That's why we got red. OK OK, we also got red because it matches the car.

Orren was about to outgrow his Britax Diplomat in height, and also, we were not satisfied with the 35 pound rear-facing weight limit. We did not want to turn him forward-facing until he is 3 years old. The reason is because the risk of death to forward-facing children in accidents decreases drastically between the ages of 3 and 6 due to spinal development. Since rear-facing until 6 is only feasible in Sweden, where they all do it that way, we have had the rear-facing goal of 3 years, but were almost sure not to make it with the 35 pound limit of our Britax seats.

Enter the Sunshine Kids Radian XT SL. It has the highest rear-facing weight limit available in the US at 45 pounds. It is also extremely tall, and can accommodate kids up to about Erin's height, and 80 pounds in weight. Like the Monterey booster that we bought for Erin, it's very narrow, and intended to fit three across in compact cars. Between the two seats, there is more than enough room for another seat for the next baby, so we're thrilled with that. That's one big reason we bought Sunshine Kids seats this time. See the pic? Orren loves being a rear-facing toddler!!



Then we have both of them in the car together. Can you tell how much room there is between them? It's awesome. There's plenty of room for the Primo Viaggio (infant carrier) or the Diplomat, for the third baby.

We're really happy with our new seats. The kids love them.

Our current arrangement:

2007 Chevy HHR with Monterey booster and Radian XT SL
2006 Dodge Ram with Britax Marathon and Graco Nautilus

Stored for the next baby:
Peg Perego Primo Viaggio
Britax Diplomat

We're set for a while. Thank goodness. These things ain't cheap!! HAHA!!

Parents these days...

I swear, parents are so weird these days. It's not just the obnoxious toddler mommies who think they are qualified to give advice concerning school aged kids and issues thereof, or can't quite fathom why my 6-year-old would not enjoy their kid's Dora the Explorer themed 2nd birthday party.

No, this is about other things. There was a recent conversation about alcohol consumption during pregnancy. Now, while I didn't drink while pregnant, I know plenty of people who have had a glass of wine every now and again, and have heard plenty of doctors say it's fine to do that, as long as it's not frequent. I've even heard some midwives advise patients to drink two glasses of red wine prior to them attempting to turn a breech baby to the correct position. It is to relax them, and actually, it's a lot less harmful to the baby than the usual method of relaxing the mom for that particular procedure. What is that method, you ask? An epidural, of course!! Yes, two glasses of wine (granted, as an isolated incident, not on a weekly basis or anything) causes LESS harm to the baby than an epidural.

At the mention of this, I am assumed to be a stupid and abusive mother who doesn't care about my babies. Hmmmm ok.... That's why I planned natural, non-hospital births (yeah yeah, only one was a success), attempted to breastfeed, vaccinated selectively, and feed them the best food possible (while your kid ate nuggets and fries last night, my two ate baked tilapia, brown rice, and lima beans). You're right. I don't give a crap about these kids. In fact, where did the small one go, and why is the front door open? And why is the bigger one playing with a bottle of Drano while watching Jerry Springer? Just kidding.

Seriously, though, the implication that anyone who doesn't believe that one sip of wine late in pregnancy will condemn the baby to a life of disability and hardship, is uncaring and abusive is just ridiculous. It only makes it 100 times more ridiculous to me that it comes from people who ALL had intervention-laden hospital births, complete with epidural. Just ask them. They'll sing the praises of that disgusting epidural all day long.

Let me just expand on the hypocrisy of that for just a minute. Wine comes from grapes. You can even buy organic wine. The drug in an epidural is derived from cocaine. A small glass of wine stays with you for an hour or so. In many cases, an epidural flows all day. Have you ever seen a baby born to a mom who had an epidural? They're drugged! Is it any wonder WHY that is? No, of course not. I mean, it takes a strong substance to completely numb the body from chest to toe. This substance is much stronger than a glass of wine.

I'm not just talking about this based on the things I've read. I actually had an epidural during my first labor, and I'll tell you, that was a disgusting and awful thing, which I wouldn't recommend to my worst enemy, far less anyone else! The drugs in that thing are no joke. It feels like you drank or inhaled everything under the kitchen sink, and chased it down with a fifth of vodka. It is an absolutely disgusting feeling, and I have no idea why so many people think it's better than just feeling the contractions. It isn't. Plus, the recovery time after that type of birth is dismal. It takes days to feel better. Additionally, the baby is born drugged, and not the least bit alert. Erin was practically asleep. With Orren's birth, which was totally unmedicated, intervention-free, and exactly the way nature (and I) intended, 5 minutes after he was born, I was up and about, and felt like dancing, or running a marathon, or singing, or jumping in the ocean, or something! He was alert, and stayed awake with me and Thak for hours after he was born. He also nursed much more strongly than Erin ever did, and I believe that's 100% due to the fact that he wasn't drugged up whereas she was.

The point is that everyone thinks that an epidural is just the normal thing to do, and doesn't give it a second thought, even though it's very hard drug that's got some pretty sinister contents. Yet these same people look down on anyone who might have one glass of wine in the course of a pregnancy. Really? To me, a glass of merlot is by far the lesser of those two evils. (In fact, a single small glass is probably not an evil at all. I've even heard doctors say as much!) I wonder if it ever occurred to these women who are so quick to judge anyone who takes so much as a sip of wine, that their babies were born full of cocaine because of the epidural they think is SO great, and that the pain medications they think they need after the birth do come out in breastmilk, so they fed their babies pain killers, sometimes as strong as percocet. How can drugged up moms actually speak ill of anyone? What's really funny is that they don't even realize how ridiculous they are, and that their arguments are hollow. They really think they have a leg to stand on. That's the part that blows my mind.

Ugh... football

So Thak is watching the Superbowl for the commercials. I personally cannot stand either team that's playing, so for the first time in 20 years, I'm not making a prediction for who's going to win, because honestly, I don't care. This Superbowl is the battle of two evils, and if there were a way for both teams to lose, that is what I would want.

Is there really a more classless (or inappropriately named) football team in the entire world than the New Orleans Saints? If there is, I haven't seen it. I swear I'm not just saying this because I'm a Vikings fan. Before the NFC Championship game, I had not watched the Saints play, and as far as I was aware, they were just a good football team... kind of like the Vikings, but with a bigger stadium, and uglier uniforms. I was fully prepared to support whatever NFC team went to the Superbowl, Vikings or Saints, but that was BEFORE I saw them play. After that game, with how dirty they played, I can't stand the Saints, and cannot wish them well in any endeavor, especially not the Superbowl.

I was extremely unimpressed with the fact that the Saints conduct themselves like a street gang, talk more trash than anyone else we have ever seen, and make EXTREMELY late hits. Yeah, sorry, that 15 yard penalty for a personal foul did not compensate for the injury that it caused to Brett Favre. I hope that player who hit him, oh, about 5 seconds late, gets fined more than he made that game. It was a disgusting dirty hit. They knew that Brett is 40 years old, and maybe more susceptible to injuries, so they figured they'd go ahead and take him out, knowing good and well that we have no back-up worth mentioning. While this would be a sound strategy at war, in football, it's just dirty. You don't try to intentionally injure players, especially through hitting them late multiple times, when they are not expecting it. Teams that engage in this kind of thing are nasty, and not worthy of anything good. Throughout that game, I also saw many Saints players trying to start fights with many of our players, and our guys walked away from it every time, reassuring each other that it wasn't worth a penalty to stoop to their level. Honestly, even though they lost in overtime, I was SO proud of our Vikings for being the classy team we know them to be, even when tested to the core on that by the nasty New Orleans street gang they had to put up with for 4 quarters (plus OT). Nobody will ever be able to accuse the Vikings of being dishonest and nasty. That's worth something, because nobody can ever honestly say that the Saints AREN'T dishonest and nasty.

I'm all for having a cohesive team. The Vikings play like all of them are brothers. As much as I dislike the Packers, the same can be said of them. They are both extremely cohesive teams, but they do not act like street gangs. You will not find a bigger rivalry in pro football than the Vikings and the Packers. This rivalry runs deep, and has been around as long as the teams themselves, which predates my lifetime by a long shot. Even so, and even though they face one another twice a year, one time at each stadium, there were NO fist fights that broke out in EITHER of the Vikings vs Packers games this year. None. Was there trash talking? You bet, especially since we have Brett, and they probably wish they still did, but I heard the audio feed from one of the players they had mic'd up during the game, and it really wasn't all that bad. Both teams came out to play football as best they could, and kick the other team's ass fair and square. I can respect any team that plays like that. I may not LIKE all teams this can be said of, but I certainly RESPECT them for not losing sight of what football is about.

Football is NOT about ANYTHING I've seen the Saints do. For one thing, in what little of the Superbowl I have watched, I've seen more fist fights break out, and at the most ridiculous of times, than I could ever imagine would happen in one single game. The Saints are just nasty. They're mean, and ugly, and wouldn't know good football if it came up and bit them.

I'm so sick of their fans, too. "Who dat?!" "Who dat?!" they say all day long. That's how you know your team is ghetto scum. Your motto and rally cry is "Who dat?" "Dat" is not even a word. We have "Skol Vikings!" Skol is Norwegian for "Cheers" or "Salute". It's a toast. It's a real word, even if not English.

I really hate that evil and stupid triumphed over good and honest this year. This is the worst Superbowl I have EVER watched. That would not be the case if it were any other team but the Saints playing for the NFC. Obviously, I do wish it were the Vikings, and we were a coin toss away, but really, anybody would be better than the Saints. I don't know if I've ever seen such a disgusting team in pro football. May their first Superbowl be their last.