Ugh... what do you do??

So I know this girl. I met her here, and she's moved to another post since. She's really nice, and tries her best to be a good mom. As far as military wives go, she's one of the better moms I've seen, with one notable exception. She's the WORST when it comes to carseats.

First of all, this woman sat there and told me how she forward-faced all her kids (who are TINY for their ages) at 8 months old just because she wanted to, and laughed about it. Yeah, lifelong paralysis due to a low-speed crash is a gas, and death of internal decapitation is flat fucking hilarious, right? Here, watch me strap my huge for his age toddler in rear-facing until he's 3 and reaches an important milestone of spinal development. She's commented about how strict I am with my kids for insisting on proper carseat use every time. Strict? I call it informed. The research is everywhere. Those who won't use it are stupid. (Yeah, I said stupid. What else is there to call it when the knowledge is everywhere, and someone does this crap anyhow?)

The problem is that this girl posts all these pictures all the time of her kids in the car. It's like I said before, Murphy's Law of carseats is that those whose kids will be lucky to survive their parents' ignorance (or stupidity as the case may be), take more carseat pics than any other group of society. This is the epitome. I know it's legal (although nobody recommends it anymore) but seeing pictures of a tiny forward-facing 2-year-old is not cute. It's sad. Seeing pictures of a 1-year-old who's well under 20 pounds forward-facing "just like big brother" is even sadder, and also illegal. These, I have learned not to say anything about. People always come up with some bullshit excuse about how their pediatrician said it was ok since the baby's feet were touching the seat back, and he could hold his head up well (yeah, because muscle development totally overrides lack of spinal development??), or something else equally ridiculous. Those pictures are still sad, but people will never listen. They're always in a rush to turn their kids forward-facing.

The last straw was today, though. I saw a pic of this girl's oldest kid, who's basically Erin's age. This one is also small for age, but maybe about Erin's size. As anyone who knows me knows, Erin rides in a high-back booster. Currently, she's using a Graco Nautilus, but usually, she has a Sunshine Kids Monterey, and we're going to be replacing her Nautilus with a Britax Parkway very soon. A good high-back booster is what's appropriate for a kid this age and size. In some vehicles, you can get away with using a backless (although that's NOT ideal at all), but there absolutely must be a head rest behind the child, or else they risk massive spinal injury in a crash. The function of a booster is to position the seatbelt correctly on a child who's not yet tall enough to wear it by itself. The shoulder portion of the belt must go over the middle of the shoulder, and the lap portion must go over the tops of the thighs. Poor belt positioning can cause extensive internal injury. Most people don't know how important it is to properly fit the booster to the child. Its function has nothing to do with being able to see out the windows. It can save a child's life in a crash if it is well-fitting.

Anyhow, this child was in an Alpha Omega Elite, aka, the worst seat ever made. The reason I say the AOE is the worst seat ever made is because it tries to put ten pounds of shit in a five pound sack, and makes cheap ignorant parents think they can use it for something they can't. The shell of this seat is fairly close in height to a Britax Marathon (if anything, it's probably shorter), and it's got these awful hook for the seatbelt on the sides, so that parents get the idea that it can be used as a booster when the harness is outgrown (BTW, it's harness slots are super short, too, and the tallest of them cannot be used rear-facing!!) The idiots gave this thing a 30-100 pound rating in booster mode, so parents think they can put their kid in it for as long as they need a booster, because what kid weighs over 100 pounds by 6 or 8 years old, which is when anyone dumb enough to buy that line of shit would stop using a booster, period.

OK, so the AOE has a super short shell. Orren would be an ideal height for the AOE in booster-mode, just to give you a clue. (Not that I would EVER put Orren in a booster at this point.) This kid who's Erin's age, was in this seat, with the shoulder belt through the top hook, and hitting so low that it didn't even touch the shoulder, and cut across the abdomen in such a way that the liver would likely be cut clear in half by the force of it in a crash. What's worse, this kid's head and shoulders were above the top of the shell. (Apparently this kid has one hell of a torso height.) Now, as previously mentioned, a kid that age NEEDS a headrest. Their bones are ossified enough to ride forward-facing, and they are mentally mature enough to be ok to ride in a well-positioned seatbelt rather than a 5-point harness, BUT they absolutely must have a headrest or they risk massive neck injury in a crash. ANY high-back booster on the planet has sufficient head support, many of them excellent. The AOE, however, has absolutely nothing.

I mean, if you're going to spend $130 on a carseat for a 2nd grader, why would you not go ahead and buy a really nice booster? A Parkway is only $120. A Monterey is $140. You can even get a Graco Turbobooster, which would totally get the job done for $50.

I'm really debating whether or not to say anything to this girl. On one hand, I don't think she'd really listen, and most people get really offended if you tell them they're doing something wrong (even if they would find the same if they ever bothered to read up on important and pertinent topics). I get the feeling that she's one of those "If my kid's ass is in contact with a carseat, they have a magical bubble of safety no matter how poorly I'm using it." moms. On the other hand, this poor kid doesn't stand a chance if they ever get into an accident (and this mom is a self-professed horrible driver), and I wonder if it's my duty to at least TRY to get this mom to run down to the nearest Wal Mart and pick up a Turbobooster to at least give this kid some head support and a properly fitting seatbelt. (Plus, the Turbo comes in awesome colors. The kid would adore it!)

I've got the picture. I'm not going to post it here. Anyone whom I know well enough to share it with knows how to contact me, and if you do, I'll gladly email it to you so you can see for yourself. It will make your jaw drop to the floor.