How we live.

Ever since the Utah job fell through, we've had to really figure things out. A lot has to change. For one thing, we are about to lose our house. We have to figure out somewhere else to go, and fast. I decided to look for a duplex because there are many throughout our city that are really cheap, and that's what we need right now. I found one! It's in Central, which is not exactly convenient to Erin's school, but is very convenient to Thak's work, and the rent is SO cheap. The neighborhood isn't bad either. It's nowhere near fabulous or anything, but I know people who live over there, and they aren't getting carjacked or anything, so the location will work. It's half what our house costs every month, and includes utilities. It's ADORABLE, too, with hardwood floors throughout, lots of windows, a big fenced yard that's common to both units, and a small fenced side yard that only goes to that unit. The wrinkle? It's a 2 BR 1 BA. That doesn't really bother us at this point, though. If they'll lease it to us, we'll make it work.

In one bedroom, we'll put Erin and Orren. Erin's bed has 3 drawers underneath it, and those will serve as her dresser. Orren and Chai share a dresser already. We put Erin and Orren's beds in the one room, along with Orren and Chai's dresser. Then Chai sleeps with us, as he already does. We'll set his crib up in our room, because he's outgrowing his bassinet. Their toys and books will end up being mostly in the living room, but that's ok. We'll figure it out. It'll be tight, but it'll work, and we can afford it on Thak's current pay. We still hope he gets another job, and the sooner the better, but if we can get this duplex, we can make it work for as long as it takes for a new job to come through, especially if his boss gets him another promotion, like he's trying to do.

The thing is, I'm so nervous about what people will say if we are able to do this. It seems like kids sharing rooms is a big taboo these days, especially boys and girls sharing rooms. I honestly don't see the big deal at this age. It would be different if they were teenagers or something, but they're not, not even close. And I have no idea where people hear this stuff, but the state has no law saying that kids can't share rooms, so let's just put that idea out of our minds now. There is no law on this stuff. Erin and Orren absolutely can share a room, and we can cosleep with Chai as long as we want. The state of Texas is not going to take our kids away because they share a room. That is a ridiculous notion. I know it's going to get brought up, though, and that's why I haven't told anyone yet that we're applying for this 2 BR duplex, and if they'll lease it to us, we'll take it and be happy to have it.

It just got me thinking about the way we live in this country, and the ridiculous standards that people have. Sure, I don't WANT my kids to have to share rooms. I shared a room all my life, and hated it with a passion, especially as I got older. I hope that by the time the kids are teenagers, they will all have their own rooms. But the fact remains, that's a preference, not a necessity, and it's really not indicative of how people live around the world either. It helps to take a global view of these things, not solely an American view of them. Kids around the world share rooms in every way you can imagine, and most of them turn out just fine. When they don't turn out just fine, it's pretty much never the room arrangement that did it to them, either.

I like this photo essay. I showed it to Erin when she was feeling sorry for herself because we can no longer afford the things we used to be able to afford. It's powerful to see these things. I think after looking at this, and seeing how so many people around the world live, the idea of Erin and Orren (who are inseparable as it is) sharing a bedroom in a well kept duplex, is not so strange or shocking anymore. In fact, it seems pretty ok, right?

It took me a minute, too. When you have the American mentality of everyone needing their own rooms, boys and girls never sharing rooms, siblings with an age difference more than a couple years never sharing rooms, and things of this nature, it becomes kind of a last resort to throw your 8-year-old girl in with her 2.5-year-old brother. Funny enough, they're excited about the prospect of sharing a room! Neither of them ever has. It seems like a sleepover every day to them. Of course, that will last until they see the reality of the situation, that they have no privacy, no space of their own, and that sort of thing, but again.... first world problems. If that's the worst you've got, you're doing pretty good in the grand scheme of things.

So basically, we're just hoping that they'll lease us the duplex. It's kind of iffy since we do have so many kids, but you never know. I think it is a good sign that the same day we found the listing for the duplex, a check came in the mail from Tricare, reimbursing us for part of what we paid for Chai's birth, so now we have the money to pay the deposit. Before, we knew we had to move, but we couldn't afford to. Now we can. This is a good sign, just the luck we needed.