Guilt: It's what They want you to have.

This blog post is made of pure win. It's long, but worth every second it takes to read it. In case you don't have time to read it, I'll give you the gist now, and you can go back and read it later. Basically, this was written by a lactation consultant, regarding the way formula companies have manipulated our society so much that no only do they get to advertise their product as inherently good, but the detractors from that sentiment are accused of trying to make the formula users feel guilty. It's a crazy marketing ploy that wouldn't work for nearly anything else in life, but for formula, it works like a charm. This is probably (and I'm extrapolating here) a huge part of the reason breastfeeding rates in the US are so abysmal.

Anyhow, I think this article is completely ingenious and correct, and I also think it applies to so many other areas of parenting. Like many things in our society, parenting is profit-driven. It's a market, and a lot of people stand to profit from it. Funny enough, the most popular choices are often the most costly, and I think the way they keep that going is by hushing those who dare to say, "Hey, you know there's a simpler and cheaper way to do this." by saying we are making those who choose the more expensive, mainstream way, feel guilty for their choices. Parenting in the US these days has become a mine field of guilt, whether real or perceived. I would say it's more perceived than real. The fact is, a well researched decision is not one anybody will feel guilty for making. Anyone who truly feels guilty over something, feels that way because they didn't do their homework before choosing. That's not what this is about, though. This is about the marketing ploy of the entities who stand to profit from mainstream parenting decisions, hushing the educated crowd who isn't buying what they're selling, by telling us that we are trying to make the mainstream people feel guilty for going that way, when really, that's not the case at all. They essentially get to market their wares to anybody who will listen, AND hush the opposition at the same time. What a racket they have going!

It starts before birth. In the US, over 90% of births are attended by an obstetrician. Obstetricians charge about 10x as much as a Certified Professional Midwife charges. 99% of babies are born in hospitals, when a hospital birth costs about 5x as much as a birth center birth, and 10x as much as a homebirth. WHY are so many people going with the more expensive option? (And we're not talking about chump change here. What you'd pay for a hospital birth and OB's care would be enough to buy you a brand new BWM.) Well, we've had it drilled into us by the US's medical associations like the American College of Obstetrics and Gynecology (ACOG) that birth is dangerous, a disaster waiting to happen, and that of course, even the healthy woman in her 20's, with a full term baby, and absolutely no risk factors whatsoever, needs to have a trained surgeon close at hand when she gives birth, and that she should definitely not be more than a few yards from the nearest fully stocked operating room, because remember, birth is dangerous.

Enter at stage right, a homebirth mom. "Uh, my son was born 10 pounds, had shoulder dystocia, and a nuchal hand, and we had a low placenta, and a mild hemorrhage following the third stage, and we were totally fine birthing at home with a Certified Professional Midwife. Birth is no scarier than you make it. If the hospital scene freaks you out, you should interview a few midwives, maybe tour a birth center, and see what you think." Inevitably, the outcry follows. HOW DARE SHE?!! That filthy, homebirthing, pot smoking, tabbouleh eating, placenta ingesting, hippie, has just attempted to make the hospital birthing mom feel guilty over choosing what is best for her baby! How could she?! But what did the homebirth mom really do, besides encourage the other mom to pursue her options and trust her gut? I'm the homebirth mom in that situation, and I can't even tell you how many times I've been told I made someone feel guilty for their birthing choices by simply telling them (after they told me that they didn't like something about the hospital thing) how to pursue their options. Giving them the phone number for the local midwifery school, or the website address for a homebirth midwife, is to make a hospital birther feel guilty, according to a lot of people. News flash, people. ACOG did this. They want you to think birth is dangerous, and they want you to think that anyone who says it isn't, is guilting you. Do you have any idea how much money these people make off every birth? They are doing this for profit. It is a multi-billion dollar industry, and it would not be if people were not duped into thinking that anyone outside the mainstream is trying to guilt them, and actually pursued their options and learned about them more.

After the birth, it continues. Congratulations! You had a boy! What nearly always follows? "Want him circumcised?" A great many doctors will find a million reasons to tell you why it's a good idea to circumcise your son. Every single one of these reasons is BS and has been determined invalid. There is NO valid reason to circumcise a baby. It is cosmetic surgery with absolutely no health benefit whatsoever. Why are doctors pushing it, then? Well, it pays about $400 a pop. Convince a few people a month to let you do it to their baby, and that's your mortgage payment. Convince a few more, it could be enough to pay for a lovely trip to Cancun. Circumcision is definitely one of the biggest rackets going in this country. Yet, say it's unnecessary, and you're trying to make someone feel guilty for wanting to do it, or for doing it. This again, is a product of the people who profit from it. The medical associations push this "It's the parents' choice" thing, when they KNOW good and well that there is no health benefit, and honestly, it stands pretty solidly against the Hippocratic Oath to even offer this as a service that parents can choose for their sons, without their sons' informed consent. First, do no harm. Yet, we have so many botched circumcisions every year. Hundreds of babies die of complications from circumcision worldwide every year. This procedure needs to be banned worldwide, just as it has been in Sweden and South Africa! Yet here in the US, we must not make the parents who choose it feel guilty, by presenting facts on it. No, that would be cruel... or so the man holding the knife, with the fat wallet in his pocket, tells us.

It doesn't stop there either! The baby is now 2 months old. Let's go to the doctor. Time for some immunizations! First of all, what are we immunizing them against? It's commonly heard that those of us who choose to either forgo vaccinations completely, or vaccinate minimally, are being ridiculous. After all, we had all our shots, and we're fine. This is completely true. Most of us did have all our shots. However, I was born in 1981. My children were born in 2003, 2008, and 2011. In the decades that spanned between those years, the number of vaccinations children are given in this country has doubled. Along with it, the prevalence of certain health issues has risen substantially. Is there a link? There could be. In countries that vaccinate a lot less than we do, such as Finland, there is also substantially less incidence of a great many conditions we see only rising in number here. So WHY do doctors continue to push vaccinations? Well, big pharma pretty much owns the doctors. Some of the vaccine manufacturers even pay kickbacks for every dose of their vaccine given. They give doctors all kinds of free stuff for pushing their vaccines. It is in big pharma's best interest to vaccinate the crap out of every living thing, because they get paid for it. The doctors are merely the middle men. This is very profit-based. Yet you mention this to someone whose child has had a bad reaction to a vaccine, that maybe they would like to read up on alternatives to vaccination on a traditional schedule, to prevent this kind of thing from happening in the future, and you're trying to make them feel guilty. How many times have I heard it? "Sure, my kid became severely autistic after his 12 month vaccinations, but my doctor said not to let those anti-vaccine lunatics make me feel guilty about it. I continue to vaccinate on schedule." Automatically, people who suggest researching and becoming educated on the subject, are lunatics who are trying to guilt parents into something. The ad campaign is working.

Somewhere in there, someone offered you formula. Every breastfeeding mom I know who does well baby visits (Again, that's a for-profit racket in and of itself) has been encouraged to formula feed, told that it's just as good, not to feel guilty for it, no matter what those breastfeeding nazis say... Lather, rinse, repeat. The cycle continues, and the great publicity machine that has overtaken American parenting claims another one. Break free, fellow parents. Educating does not equal guilt tripping. Talking candidly about these things, and truly forming opinions free of profit driven bias, is the only way we will ever break free from the machine that the big corporations are using to control us.