Little Debbie cakes, public school, and standards.

Erin's teacher sent home a note asking that I send in Little Debbie cakes for field day next week.  Seems fair enough, right?  Really, it is.  Here's the thing, though.  This is about the 4th junk food request, and Erin's been in that school about a month.  It's getting pretty ridiculous.  We don't eat like that, and buying that stuff sends the wrong message to Erin.  Erin has to have things very black and white.  If she sees us buying something, she thinks it's good, and that she can ask for it again (and by again, I mean every day for the next five years.)  Case in point, I bought her Spaghettios once when I was pregnant with Orren, and too nauseous to cook her anything.  Thak was deployed, and I had to feed Erin, so I bought her Spaghettios.  I was 14 months into a 15 month deployment, and fighting morning sickness that was really more like all day sickness (I know what you're thinking... Orren was an R&R baby.) I did what I had to do.  Do you know, Erin is STILL asking for Spaghettios?  She literally asked for them yesterday.  She's had them that one time in her entire life.  There is no mental capacity for "this is a one time thing" within Erin. None.  If I buy Little Debbie cakes once, I will be plagued to buy them again every time we set foot in a grocery store for the rest of my life.

I can't just send nothing, though, and I don't want to be that smart ass parent who sends fruit when asked for snack cakes, so I polled an online group of supposedly alternative local moms, for their best suggestions.  I never buy prepackaged snacks, even though I know they sell them at some of the health food stores that are organic, and made without refined sugar, and stuff like that.  I just wanted to know if anyone had a go-to snack that they use in situations like this.  The responses baffled me.

First of all, no, it's not just a one time thing, and I'm not going to just buy the Little Debbie cakes, for the reasons I already mentioned.  I understand that may be perceived as selfish to some, but honestly, with three children, two cats, a dog, and a husband who works the most unpredictable hours ever (Fly Army, y'all!!), all shoved in a 2 BR apartment in the middle of freaking nowhere (literally, an hour from any grocery store I would actually like to go to), I'll do anything to preserve any shred of sanity I may have left at this point.  Not being bothered for Little Debbie cakes every time I set foot in a grocery store for the rest of my life is a pretty big deal under the circumstances, considering all the other crap I get hit up for constantly by her (literally, every "one time thing" that there's ever been).

Secondly, I'm not going to send fruit, because 1) Erin is old enough that the other kids are going to know she's the one who brought fruit when she was supposed to bring Little Debbie cakes.  That's not exactly a popularity making move right there.  I'm not one for bending to the establishment, but at 8 years old, pretty much everybody is; And 2) This teacher seems like the type who would totally call me and be like, "Why did you send bananas when I asked for Little Debbie cakes?!" and I just really don't want to have that conversation.  The balance is to find something that is similar enough to what was requested, but without disgusting ingredients we can't pronounce.  I just need to know the names of such products so that I can know what I'm looking for when I road trip to the grocery store.

I'm also reminded that people who don't have school age kids really don't understand.  When your kids are at home with you, or minimally exposed to the outside world, in the form of preschool or playgroup, you have a whole lot more influence than you do when your kids go to school, unless you put them in a small alternative school, but even then, there will be some influence you won't like.  Trust me on this.  You will have to strike the balance.  You will have to compromise, and know when to concede.  I was ok with the first junk food request.  I was ok with the second one. (These, it was easy to find a less junky alternative to what they were asking for, that filled the same role. This one had me stumped since homemade stuff isn't allowed.)  I'm not sitting here insisting that everything always be my way, or that things be ideal.  I'm also not willing to just go with whatever crap they want me to go with.  When you have school age kids, you learn to strike this balance, because the kids at that age, have one foot in your world and one foot in the rest of the world.  My world might include things like a watermelon patch in the backyard, green smoothies, and at least one meal a week centered around quinoa, but the fact of the matter is, the rest of the world loves shit like Little Debbie cakes, and thinks it's a totally normal thing to request.  My kid can't strike that balance herself.  That's my job.  It's also the job of every parent who has a school age kid, and lives in a way that is not particularly mainstream.

As for me, I'm going to make a trip to Kroger.  I hear they have some cool little fruit and cereal bars (similar to nutrigrain bars) in their organics section that don't have preservatives or HFCS in them.  I'm going to check it out, and if I find such a thing, that's probably what I'll go with.  I think it's close enough.  If anyone's got a better idea, please text me about it.  I've got until Friday, and I'm open to suggestions. :)