Well, that statement is about 3/4 of the way true. I kept one of them because I use it, and am missing a molar on that side (root canal when I was 15, never got a crown for it, joined the Army 4 years later, and they pulled it). The others fit ok, too, but the top ones caused all kinds of bad alignment including an overbite, and the other lower one was just kind of crowded, and was getting some big nasty cavities that would be nearly impossible to fix, given its position. Therefore, at the age of 30, 6 years after they came in, I had 3/4 of my wisdom teeth removed. I didn't realize how odd it is to get your wisdom teeth removed after age 21, but I didn't even have them until I was 24, so it kind of figures.
At my consult with the oral surgeon (I was referred there because one of my top wisdom teeth was broken and had the possibility of having to be cut out), they asked me if I wanted to be awake or asleep. I figured awake. I mean, they weren't impacted. It should be quick and easy, right? The nurse thought that was crazy, and said that sometimes if it gets complicated, they have to have people come back and be sedated instead to finish the job. Sold. I'm doing this exactly once, and that's that. IV sedation it is. At that same appointment, the surgeon had a look at my wisdom teeth and said it should take him no more than 15 minutes to get them out, thought it would be an easy job. That was good news. I definitely like when the guy who does this stuff for a living seems to think it'll be simple.
A week later, it was time to have it done. I was given a pill called Halcion, which would help with the sedation. They told me it's similar to Valium. My RN friend Judy told me it's the same stuff they used for twilight births way back in the day. I didn't know that, but after taking it, I kind of believe it. I took the Halcion at 7:45, an hour before my appointment. Then everything got a little hazy. It was nothing like in the Army, when my buddy Scott took that stuff before having his wisdom teeth out, and passed out so hard we had to carry him down the stairs of the barracks. I just started to feel really relaxed, and in a haze. I went and sat in the car as Thak got the kids ready. I remember putting my purse in the diaper bag so that it wouldn't get lost. Then before I knew it, we were on our way to Statesboro. I vaguely remember seeing the street where we needed to turn, and hoping Thak would remember it. Then I remember getting out of the car, and sitting on the steps of the office while Thak unloaded the kids.
When we got inside, things got even hazier. I signed in, and remember thinking it was a good sign that my name was on line 7 of the sign in sheet (it was on line 13 the first time I was there. I don't like 7's or 13's on their own, but I like them together). Next thing I remember, I was being called back to get prepped, and the nurse laughed because I picked up Chai and was bringing him with me. I vaguely remember handing him to Thak, and then seeing Thak and the kids taken back to a room to see a video on how to care for me post-op, and being lead past there to the room. I remember seeing an IV bag hanging from the ceiling, and being a little freaked out by that, and also a tray full of scary looking instruments which freaked me out a little, too, but I was too groggy to say or do anything about it, so I just sat there. I remember that the IV hurt going in, being asked Thak's name twice, and how old the kids are, reminding me not to breastfeed for the rest of the day, and hearing a couple of nurses talk about how pretty Orren's hair is. The last thing I remember was having a block put in my mouth to keep it open.
After that, the next thing I remember was Thak lifting me out of a wheelchair, and helping me into the car. Then the drive home took what seemed like forever. It was only like 40 minutes, though. I don't remember coming in the house, but I do remember Thak taking my shoes off, and helping me into the bed.
I woke up about 4 hours later, not in any pain, but really thirsty because I hadn't been able to have anything to eat or drink from midnight the night prior. I took the gauze out of my mouth, and drank some water. Thak came in at some point, and checked on me. He said we were in and out of the office in 45 minutes, that Erin and Orren, who had been watching a movie on Netflix on my phone, didn't even finish their movie before it was time to go. At some point, he had run to Claxton to get my prescriptions and had gone to the grocery store for lots of pudding, ramen, soup, and jello, just anything he thought I could eat, while he was waiting for the prescriptions to be filled. He explained all my prescriptions to me (antibiotic, steroid to prevent swelling, Vicodin for pain, and an anti-nausea drug just in case), then for the rest of the day, kept the soft foods coming, while I napped on and off, sleeping off the rest of the anesthesia.
All in all, it was easier than I thought it would be. I didn't have any swelling, and only one tiny bruise that should go away in a couple weeks or less. I haven't had to take any pain medication or anti-nausea medication. Well, I did take a couple Tylenol early on, but no Vicodin. I already couldn't nurse Chai for 24 hours due to the anesthesia, so I wasn't going to extend that out any. Vicodin is supposedly safe for breastfeeding, but I didn't want to chance it unless it was absolutely necessary. Luckily, it did not become necessary. That's probably because I ended up needing no cutting at all, just straight up simple extractions. That definitely makes for an easier recovery.
Thak did great the whole day. He cared for the kids all by himself, and didn't even yell at them, and he took care of me, and didn't act like it was a pain. I just texted him when I needed anything, and he'd bring it to me. Today, he's back to work, and I'm still doing great. I still have no swelling, still staying on top of the antibiotics, and need no pain medication. I even had coffee this morning! (I cooled it down to body temperature, just like the soups I ate yesterday. I'm not sure if I'm supposed to have hot drinks yet.) All in all, I wish I'd done this years ago, but Thak never had time to help me with the kids in order for me to get it done. I'm just glad to have it over with now. It wasn't half as bad as people said it was. Honestly, the worst part was that the one day Thak's cooking actually smelled edible, I couldn't eat any of whatever it was that he made! All in all, though, I am well on my way to recovery, now more than 24 hours afterward, and I am so happy to have cut the wisdom teeth population down by 75%. Things can only get better from here.
Thursday, August 2, 2012
Wednesday, August 1, 2012
Chick-Fil-A, because you knew I couldn't leave this alone.
Disclaimer: Yes, many friends of mine have various views on this topic. I'm not looking to alienate anyone, although for all the ugly crap I've seen posted online, or heard said, by people I actually like over the course of the past few days, I think this will be pretty mild. Also, keep in mind, I had my wisdom teeth out this morning under general anesthesia, and am sort of groggy, so excuse any typos.
So Chick-Fil-A (herein and throughout called CFA) hates the gays? Shocker. A company that closes all its stores on Sundays, openly promotes that they're Christian owned, and has been known to have a clause about "sexual deviance" in their employment paperwork, hates the gays. Who'd have thunk it?
With that said, I don't actually have a problem with that. Fine. Hate the gays. I don't. I happen to love the gays, but I also understand that gay rights are the last frontier of civil rights, and that we're in the throes of the fight for those rights at this very moment. I know that most of the people who think being gay is a sin, or an abomination, or whatever thing they are calling it today, will learn to accept it, or at least look away, within the years that follow LGBT Americans being conferred full civil rights, including the right to marry. People will get used to it, just like they've gotten used to a lack of slave ownership, women voting, using the same bathrooms as people of other races, and even the shocking and appalling legality of interracial marriage. (For anyone who doesn't know, I'm joking about it being shocking and appalling. I have many things in common with my husband, but race isn't one of them.) Anyway, the idea is, this gay hating is going to die down, and I'm not going to rail against it too hard in general, unless it's really in my face, because these people are going to get the idea. I have enough faith in the world to believe that good wins over evil eventually, and that LGBT people will have the right to do whatever we hetero types do, and that it will be within the next few years.
The issue with CFA is not that the CEO's son said that he's anti-gay. Let us be very clear that nobody is saying he shouldn't have said that, or trying to get in the way of his free speech. He can say whatever he wants.
Now, here is the first issue with it. It is also our right to boycott the company in light of this fact. Why on earth would I want to give a dime to a company whose owners honestly believe that my kids' favorite uncles should just go to hell, just because they're gay? The fact that some fundie Christian assholios have the stones to say, usually with a smug smile on their face, "Well, tolerance goes both ways." and imply that we should continue funneling money to these homophobic losers, is ridiculous. Do you buy condoms at Planned Parenthood just for kicks, because hey, they're cheaper there, and tolerance goes both ways, even though it goes totally against your personal philosophy to buy from an organization that performs abortions? Of course not! I'd never expect you to. Go buy your Trojans somewhere else, and I'll buy my chicken somewhere else. This is America, and we have that choice. Expecting that we'll spend money with a company whose morals we find absolutely disgusting, is ridiculous, and I'd never ask it of you.
The second issue with it is that what this guy said is not even the tip of the iceberg. Honestly, if it were just words, I'd have read the news story, shrugged, said something like, "Big surprise there", and gone about my business. The real issue, and this is what I'm having the hardest time getting people to understand, is that CFA donates millions of dollars to anti-gay organizations every year. One is the Family Research Center, which is officially classified as a hate group (against gays). Yeah, that's exactly who I want to spend my money with. Granted, I know my couple times a year CFA purchases probably put less than two cents toward that initiative, but that's two cents too many. Why should we be expected to let this slide, not boycott, not tell people about it, and just say, "Hey, it's their choice. It's a free country." That's totally idiotic. Oh, and please tell me about the last time you expressed total acceptance toward the KKK. I mean, they're just doing their thing, and their opinions and actions are generally within the realm of legality as well. Tolerance goes both ways, you know. No?
As ugly as it has gotten, maybe this CFA thing is just what America needed to finally bring LGBT rights front and center, and get over our collective hang-ups with it. Sure, the social conservatives are railing hard against it, but I get the feeling that it's their last stand. Some of my staunchly Republican friends are even disgusted with what CFA donates to, and have taken the "leave the gays alone and let them marry, then shut up about it" position, which I totally respect. Change is happening. I feel like this is just one part of it. Nobody ever said it would be pretty. Hang on, guys. It seems we're in for a bit of a ride, but I think the rewards will be worth it when we're no longer the most backward country in the entire western world.
So Chick-Fil-A (herein and throughout called CFA) hates the gays? Shocker. A company that closes all its stores on Sundays, openly promotes that they're Christian owned, and has been known to have a clause about "sexual deviance" in their employment paperwork, hates the gays. Who'd have thunk it?
With that said, I don't actually have a problem with that. Fine. Hate the gays. I don't. I happen to love the gays, but I also understand that gay rights are the last frontier of civil rights, and that we're in the throes of the fight for those rights at this very moment. I know that most of the people who think being gay is a sin, or an abomination, or whatever thing they are calling it today, will learn to accept it, or at least look away, within the years that follow LGBT Americans being conferred full civil rights, including the right to marry. People will get used to it, just like they've gotten used to a lack of slave ownership, women voting, using the same bathrooms as people of other races, and even the shocking and appalling legality of interracial marriage. (For anyone who doesn't know, I'm joking about it being shocking and appalling. I have many things in common with my husband, but race isn't one of them.) Anyway, the idea is, this gay hating is going to die down, and I'm not going to rail against it too hard in general, unless it's really in my face, because these people are going to get the idea. I have enough faith in the world to believe that good wins over evil eventually, and that LGBT people will have the right to do whatever we hetero types do, and that it will be within the next few years.
The issue with CFA is not that the CEO's son said that he's anti-gay. Let us be very clear that nobody is saying he shouldn't have said that, or trying to get in the way of his free speech. He can say whatever he wants.
Now, here is the first issue with it. It is also our right to boycott the company in light of this fact. Why on earth would I want to give a dime to a company whose owners honestly believe that my kids' favorite uncles should just go to hell, just because they're gay? The fact that some fundie Christian assholios have the stones to say, usually with a smug smile on their face, "Well, tolerance goes both ways." and imply that we should continue funneling money to these homophobic losers, is ridiculous. Do you buy condoms at Planned Parenthood just for kicks, because hey, they're cheaper there, and tolerance goes both ways, even though it goes totally against your personal philosophy to buy from an organization that performs abortions? Of course not! I'd never expect you to. Go buy your Trojans somewhere else, and I'll buy my chicken somewhere else. This is America, and we have that choice. Expecting that we'll spend money with a company whose morals we find absolutely disgusting, is ridiculous, and I'd never ask it of you.
The second issue with it is that what this guy said is not even the tip of the iceberg. Honestly, if it were just words, I'd have read the news story, shrugged, said something like, "Big surprise there", and gone about my business. The real issue, and this is what I'm having the hardest time getting people to understand, is that CFA donates millions of dollars to anti-gay organizations every year. One is the Family Research Center, which is officially classified as a hate group (against gays). Yeah, that's exactly who I want to spend my money with. Granted, I know my couple times a year CFA purchases probably put less than two cents toward that initiative, but that's two cents too many. Why should we be expected to let this slide, not boycott, not tell people about it, and just say, "Hey, it's their choice. It's a free country." That's totally idiotic. Oh, and please tell me about the last time you expressed total acceptance toward the KKK. I mean, they're just doing their thing, and their opinions and actions are generally within the realm of legality as well. Tolerance goes both ways, you know. No?
As ugly as it has gotten, maybe this CFA thing is just what America needed to finally bring LGBT rights front and center, and get over our collective hang-ups with it. Sure, the social conservatives are railing hard against it, but I get the feeling that it's their last stand. Some of my staunchly Republican friends are even disgusted with what CFA donates to, and have taken the "leave the gays alone and let them marry, then shut up about it" position, which I totally respect. Change is happening. I feel like this is just one part of it. Nobody ever said it would be pretty. Hang on, guys. It seems we're in for a bit of a ride, but I think the rewards will be worth it when we're no longer the most backward country in the entire western world.
Monday, July 23, 2012
Pertussis is on the rise, and we aren't vaccinating. Why is that?
First things first, read this.
I can hardly view any social networking site I know of these days without reading a thousand posts from people I know, people I don't know, and people I sort of know, about the current pertussis outbreak. The point of these posts is always the same, though. In a panicked tone, they plead with parents, "GET YOUR KIDS VACCINATED!!!!!!"
I have no plans to get any more of my kids vaccinated for this, or nearly anything else, and while my reasons for that will not strike you as crazy as you may think, providing that you possess some moderate level of deductive reasoning.
First of all, while pharma would like you to believe that the outbreak is because of increasing numbers of unvaccinated kids, most of the cases are in people who have been vaccinated fully. If vaccines do what we're told they do, then why are more vaccinated than unvaccinated people getting pertussis? Because vaccines do not do what we're told they do. They are nowhere near as effective as people think, and I think on some level, the average American parent knows that. I've had people say their kids couldn't play with mine because of our vaccination practices. I always ask them, "Even if my kids had some vaccine preventable disease, wouldn't your kids be protected if they're vaccinated?" It's an honest question, and it usually gets me told off. I think people know that vaccinations aren't as effective as we are lead to believe.
The other thing is, it is highly suspected that the bacteria that causes pertussis is evolving to a new strain not covered by the vaccine. If that's the case, and t could well be, then what would be the point of vaccinating for the old strain that doesn't seem to be causing the problems we're seeing lately.
I'm not telling anyone to stop vaccinating, or to alter their practices in any way. All I'm saying is, before you buy into mass hysteria, think about whether it's even an accurate statement you're making.
Tuesday, July 17, 2012
Anniversary!
Wouldn't you know it, he was right. While we have definitely been through times that were kind of a disaster, just like Drill Sergeant always said, at the end of the day, we're still here. We've had 6 homes, 2 cross country moves, some babies, and a war, among other things, and if I had to, I'd do all of it again. It isn't always pretty, and it isn't always easy, but it's always worth it.
All the astrology charts show me and Thak as basically the least compatible people ever. We laugh about it, because we are a lot different, but that's why it works. He's my order muppet, I'm his chaos muppet, and we both play a very important role for each other. Every order muppet needs a chaos muppet to keep them on their toes. Every chaos muppet needs an order muppet to keep them level headed (as much as possible anyway!). Look at us in the picture below. I'm in bright orange, he's in black. This is classic Thak and Anna. Separately, he's too dull and I'm too bright, but together, we're perfect. It's just like how he loved our wedding and I thought it sucked. The wedding is one thing that could only be chaos or order, not both, so that's why he got his way on that one, and I didn't feel like there was really any of me in it. Luckily, in everything else in life, there's room for both of our influence, and usually, that turns out pretty great.
Not to mention, we make REALLY cute babies, who are totally chaos muppets just like mommy, and we rock those carriers like nobody's business.
Here's a recent pic of us in Savannah. Yes, it's a blurry picture, but it was taken by an overly excited 8-year-old, using an iPhone, so what do you expect? Plus, we never have pictures with both of us in them anymore, so we take what we can get.
Happy Anniversary, Thak. Here's to many more.
Monday, July 16, 2012
Non-Violent Parenting, what it is, and what it isn't.
I have to step away. On one of the breastfeeding groups I'm in, someone was asking what to do about a 1.5-year-old who hits, and after receiving solid advice about redirection, and reassurance that it's just a phase, someone posted this gem:
"I was spanked as a child and I'm fine. . . if spankings felt good then they wouldn't be a negative reinforcement. To each his own, but I see many children who are not spanked turn into little wildlings :o/ Maybe in their parents eyes they have control, but to the general public they look like little hell raisers being continually "redirected," but ultimately controlling their parents behaviors. And, children are smarter than most give them credit for. But, again, to each his own. I'm definitely not condemning anyone who chooses either way ;o)"
Really? So this person evidently thinks that people who don't spank are raising kids who run all over the place out of control. Please explain to me, then, why our prisons are full of people who were spanked as kids. While spanking, taken independently, would not make a person do something to land themselves in prison, it surely doesn't help the situation. Also, I think we can all think of at least a few families we know who are always spanking their kids, and their kids still act like total crap. Obviously, spanking is not a ticket to better behaved kids. Why anyone thinks it is, is beyond me. The results of it are all around us, and they're not very encouraging.
More than any of that, though, this post highlighted a truth that has been evident for a long time. People simply don't know what discipline that doesn't include spanking even is, or how it would work. So here. I'm going to tell you about a few situations within the past few days, and how we handled them non-violently.
Situation 1:
Kid is running around in a store, starting to get out of control. He grabs something off a shelf. Dad steps in.
What you think is going to happen:
Dad says "Now, Orren, please don't grab things. It isn't nice." and then lets him continue doing what he was doing, every once in a while telling him not to do it, but not really enforcing anything.
What really happened:
Dad picks up kid, hands merchandise he was going to purchase to mom and asks her to stand in the checkout line for him, takes kid out to a bench outside the store to sit down and regroup. Talks about how we behave in stores, and why we can't pull things off shelves or run around, how that stuff is for the playground or home. By the time mom gets to the register, dad and kid have come back into the store, and kid is acting totally fine. Mom and dad both tell kid that he really did a great job being quiet and safe in the store. He's proud of himself, and does it again in the next store they go into.
Situation 2:
Mom tells kid to go get ready for bed. Kid tells mom he's going to put her in time-out.
What you think is going to happen:
Mom says, "Now Orren, we don't talk like that. It isn't nice.", kid laughs, and runs off.
What really happened:
Mom says, "Whoa, buddy! We don't talk like that! I think you need a do-over. Let's start from the part where I ask you to go get ready for bed, and you answer me the right way, ok?" He smiles.
Mom says, "Orren, go ahead and get ready for bed, buddy.", and Orren replies, "Will I get a story after I put my jammies on and brush my teeth?" Yes, of course he will. "Can it be Fergus?" he asks. Of course it can be Fergus. He goes off to pick out some jammies.
Situation 3:
Young toddler climbs up in mom's lap, and bites her.
What you think is going to happen:
Mom says, "No bite", as baby continues to bite her repeatedly.
What really happened:
Mom says, "We don't bite." and puts baby on the floor. He cries, then climbs up in her lap, and bites her again. She puts him on the floor again, telling him that we don't bite. The whole thing happens again, and a couple more times. Eventually, he climbs up in her lap, does not bite, and gets to listen to a story, because little boys who don't bite get to do fun things like that.
I think you see now, we are not really very permissive parents. We have really clear standards, and our kids are expected to meet them. We don't put up with them acting up in public, or talking back to us, or biting, or hitting, or anything else. We try to make our approach age-appropriate, and relevant to the situation. The baby, for example, cannot understand anything other than consistent redirection at his age. The preschool age boy, on the other hand, can very much understand things like being removed from a situation, a "time in" (what some people call our brand of time out), or even having a do-over if he gets mouthy. The do-over thing is new. That's the other thing. We are always having to reevaluate and tailor our approach to both of our boys (and our girl, but she's not home right now) as they learn and grow in their ability to understand more things. Non-violent parenting is not the easy way out that some people think it is. It's complex and ever changing, and it requires a lot out of a parent sometimes. It's worth it, though. So many studies have shown that spanking is bad for kids. Some countries have even made it illegal. There are so many better ways to discipline a kid that actually teach them something other than, "if I don't act right, my parent will hurt me".
"I was spanked as a child and I'm fine. . . if spankings felt good then they wouldn't be a negative reinforcement. To each his own, but I see many children who are not spanked turn into little wildlings :o/ Maybe in their parents eyes they have control, but to the general public they look like little hell raisers being continually "redirected," but ultimately controlling their parents behaviors. And, children are smarter than most give them credit for. But, again, to each his own. I'm definitely not condemning anyone who chooses either way ;o)"
Really? So this person evidently thinks that people who don't spank are raising kids who run all over the place out of control. Please explain to me, then, why our prisons are full of people who were spanked as kids. While spanking, taken independently, would not make a person do something to land themselves in prison, it surely doesn't help the situation. Also, I think we can all think of at least a few families we know who are always spanking their kids, and their kids still act like total crap. Obviously, spanking is not a ticket to better behaved kids. Why anyone thinks it is, is beyond me. The results of it are all around us, and they're not very encouraging.
More than any of that, though, this post highlighted a truth that has been evident for a long time. People simply don't know what discipline that doesn't include spanking even is, or how it would work. So here. I'm going to tell you about a few situations within the past few days, and how we handled them non-violently.
Situation 1:
Kid is running around in a store, starting to get out of control. He grabs something off a shelf. Dad steps in.
What you think is going to happen:
Dad says "Now, Orren, please don't grab things. It isn't nice." and then lets him continue doing what he was doing, every once in a while telling him not to do it, but not really enforcing anything.
What really happened:
Dad picks up kid, hands merchandise he was going to purchase to mom and asks her to stand in the checkout line for him, takes kid out to a bench outside the store to sit down and regroup. Talks about how we behave in stores, and why we can't pull things off shelves or run around, how that stuff is for the playground or home. By the time mom gets to the register, dad and kid have come back into the store, and kid is acting totally fine. Mom and dad both tell kid that he really did a great job being quiet and safe in the store. He's proud of himself, and does it again in the next store they go into.
Situation 2:
Mom tells kid to go get ready for bed. Kid tells mom he's going to put her in time-out.
What you think is going to happen:
Mom says, "Now Orren, we don't talk like that. It isn't nice.", kid laughs, and runs off.
What really happened:
Mom says, "Whoa, buddy! We don't talk like that! I think you need a do-over. Let's start from the part where I ask you to go get ready for bed, and you answer me the right way, ok?" He smiles.
Mom says, "Orren, go ahead and get ready for bed, buddy.", and Orren replies, "Will I get a story after I put my jammies on and brush my teeth?" Yes, of course he will. "Can it be Fergus?" he asks. Of course it can be Fergus. He goes off to pick out some jammies.
Situation 3:
Young toddler climbs up in mom's lap, and bites her.
What you think is going to happen:
Mom says, "No bite", as baby continues to bite her repeatedly.
What really happened:
Mom says, "We don't bite." and puts baby on the floor. He cries, then climbs up in her lap, and bites her again. She puts him on the floor again, telling him that we don't bite. The whole thing happens again, and a couple more times. Eventually, he climbs up in her lap, does not bite, and gets to listen to a story, because little boys who don't bite get to do fun things like that.
I think you see now, we are not really very permissive parents. We have really clear standards, and our kids are expected to meet them. We don't put up with them acting up in public, or talking back to us, or biting, or hitting, or anything else. We try to make our approach age-appropriate, and relevant to the situation. The baby, for example, cannot understand anything other than consistent redirection at his age. The preschool age boy, on the other hand, can very much understand things like being removed from a situation, a "time in" (what some people call our brand of time out), or even having a do-over if he gets mouthy. The do-over thing is new. That's the other thing. We are always having to reevaluate and tailor our approach to both of our boys (and our girl, but she's not home right now) as they learn and grow in their ability to understand more things. Non-violent parenting is not the easy way out that some people think it is. It's complex and ever changing, and it requires a lot out of a parent sometimes. It's worth it, though. So many studies have shown that spanking is bad for kids. Some countries have even made it illegal. There are so many better ways to discipline a kid that actually teach them something other than, "if I don't act right, my parent will hurt me".
Look! We can grow tomatoes!
Sunday, July 15, 2012
How to vote, and not screw yourself over in the process
Ah, it's an election year! Time for everyone to polarize, sling mud, make false accusations, and insinuate that people who don't agree with them are definitely responsible for the downfall of this country. Isn't it grand this thing we do every four years here in the land of apple pie and baseball? I understand how hard it can be to wade through the mud that everyone else is slinging, so I'm going to break this down quick and easy for all you people who might be confused about how to vote. I'm not going to tell you who to vote for. I'm going to tell you how to decide. Remember, everything here is opinion. I don't claim it to be anything else. Anyway, without further ado, here's my version of how to cast a vote and not totally screw yourself over in the process.
First of all, look at who you are, what demographic you fit into, and what issues might pertain to you either directly or indirectly. I, for example, am female, 30 years old, have three children, and a husband who is in the military (Reserves). I am also a veteran, a gun owner, and hoping to be a land owner and organic farmer sometime in the not so distant future.
Let's pick this apart and see what interest groups I fall into:
Woman
Mother
Military/Veteran
Gun Owner
Possibly needs a mortgage
Possibly family farmer
Let's look at the issues that pertain to each of these. (One of those story web graphs you learned back in school could be handy here). For mine, we'll just do three.
Woman:
Reproductive rights
Healthcare
Mother:
Schools
Healthcare
Military/Veteran:
War in Afghanistan
War in other places??
VA
OK, so now we see that the issues that are going to impact my life the most are reproductive rights, healthcare, education, war, and veterans' benefits. Now, I need to figure out where I stand on all these issues.
Reproductive rights:
Uphold Roe vs Wade. I hope to never have to use the freedoms it grants, but it would hugely chip away at women's rights for Roe to be overturned. Not to mention, it would result in unsafe healthcare for many women all over the nation. Roe must stay. We also need better access to contraception, even to minors, without parental consent. Planned Parenthood is a vital and important part of that, and it needs support. Abstinence Only education in schools is inadequate. Homebirth midwives must be licensed to practice in all states. We also need greater maternity leave so that working mothers have a better shot at breastfeeding.
Healthcare:
Obamacare must stand. There are parts of it I absolutely despise, but the fact that insurance companies can no longer turn people away for preexisting conditions, and cannot drop people from coverage for no reason, is reason enough to keep it. I also would like to see increased pressure on health insurance companies to cover things like homebirth, birth center birth, and high quality breastpumps. I would like to see that nobody uses the ER as their primary care physician anymore, that there is an alternative to that. I would also like to see WIC stop providing formula for those who are getting it without medical need, as this would drive the cost of formula down, and promote breastfeeding, thus resulting in a healthier nation on the whole.
Military/Veteran:
The wars must end. The VA must be funded. Better programs for female veterans must be put into place. Continue to improve programs for veterans with PTSD and related issues. Extend standards for Purple Heart medal to include veterans with PTSD. Clarify VA disability rating standards, and make the process easier to navigate for new vets (or their thoroughly confused spouses... LOL).
So now that I know where I stand on important issues, I can start to get a better idea of what candidates would suit me the best. Then I can narrow it down based on voting records and past bills sponsored/vetoed/signed in. Then hopefully, by the time I reach the voting booth in November, I will know exactly who represents me the best.
I recommend everybody do the same. Voting for some political party because your parents do is crazy. Voting for whoever pays the most lip service to some issue is sometimes misguided. (Military people, I'm looking at you. Those Republicans will give us all the pretty things and pay raises our hearts desire, but they send us into unjust wars and some of us die. Is it worth it?)
Don't even get me going on values voting. It may be the dumbest thing I have ever heard of. I swear, every time I hear some guy who lives in a trailer park say he's voting Republican because they're pro-life, I want to scream, because sure, they're pro-life, but they also are going to tax the crap out of him, make sure his standard of living doesn't improve at all, and might even go down, while padding their bank accounts on the results of his hard work. You don't want to do that. The fact is, there are a lot of people out there who want nothing more than a bunch more cogs for their machine, and get them with ease by playing to the values voting crowd, leading them like lambs to the slaughter.
I'll say, the major two parties are both full of problems, but I think, for each of us, we can figure out some candidate, be they major party or smaller party, that will suit our needs well enough to earn our vote. I also think it's important to understand how our political system works. Learn how the parties work, how the electoral votes are distributed, and what your vote actually does when it leaves your hands at the ballot box. This could sway you from choosing the best fit for you over all, to the best fit from one of the major parties, or the other way around. You absolutely must understand our political process before you vote. To do otherwise is to go off half cocked.
We have this cool thing called democracy here, but unfortunately, I see a lot of people just totally making a mess out of it because they simply don't know how to use it. My hope is that before this next election, people will educate themselves.
Also, don't vote for Mitt Romney. He big time sucks. <---- Opinion. But if you decide to heed it, I won't complain.
First of all, look at who you are, what demographic you fit into, and what issues might pertain to you either directly or indirectly. I, for example, am female, 30 years old, have three children, and a husband who is in the military (Reserves). I am also a veteran, a gun owner, and hoping to be a land owner and organic farmer sometime in the not so distant future.
Let's pick this apart and see what interest groups I fall into:
Woman
Mother
Military/Veteran
Gun Owner
Possibly needs a mortgage
Possibly family farmer
Let's look at the issues that pertain to each of these. (One of those story web graphs you learned back in school could be handy here). For mine, we'll just do three.
Woman:
Reproductive rights
Healthcare
Mother:
Schools
Healthcare
Military/Veteran:
War in Afghanistan
War in other places??
VA
OK, so now we see that the issues that are going to impact my life the most are reproductive rights, healthcare, education, war, and veterans' benefits. Now, I need to figure out where I stand on all these issues.
Reproductive rights:
Uphold Roe vs Wade. I hope to never have to use the freedoms it grants, but it would hugely chip away at women's rights for Roe to be overturned. Not to mention, it would result in unsafe healthcare for many women all over the nation. Roe must stay. We also need better access to contraception, even to minors, without parental consent. Planned Parenthood is a vital and important part of that, and it needs support. Abstinence Only education in schools is inadequate. Homebirth midwives must be licensed to practice in all states. We also need greater maternity leave so that working mothers have a better shot at breastfeeding.
Healthcare:
Obamacare must stand. There are parts of it I absolutely despise, but the fact that insurance companies can no longer turn people away for preexisting conditions, and cannot drop people from coverage for no reason, is reason enough to keep it. I also would like to see increased pressure on health insurance companies to cover things like homebirth, birth center birth, and high quality breastpumps. I would like to see that nobody uses the ER as their primary care physician anymore, that there is an alternative to that. I would also like to see WIC stop providing formula for those who are getting it without medical need, as this would drive the cost of formula down, and promote breastfeeding, thus resulting in a healthier nation on the whole.
Military/Veteran:
The wars must end. The VA must be funded. Better programs for female veterans must be put into place. Continue to improve programs for veterans with PTSD and related issues. Extend standards for Purple Heart medal to include veterans with PTSD. Clarify VA disability rating standards, and make the process easier to navigate for new vets (or their thoroughly confused spouses... LOL).
So now that I know where I stand on important issues, I can start to get a better idea of what candidates would suit me the best. Then I can narrow it down based on voting records and past bills sponsored/vetoed/signed in. Then hopefully, by the time I reach the voting booth in November, I will know exactly who represents me the best.
I recommend everybody do the same. Voting for some political party because your parents do is crazy. Voting for whoever pays the most lip service to some issue is sometimes misguided. (Military people, I'm looking at you. Those Republicans will give us all the pretty things and pay raises our hearts desire, but they send us into unjust wars and some of us die. Is it worth it?)
Don't even get me going on values voting. It may be the dumbest thing I have ever heard of. I swear, every time I hear some guy who lives in a trailer park say he's voting Republican because they're pro-life, I want to scream, because sure, they're pro-life, but they also are going to tax the crap out of him, make sure his standard of living doesn't improve at all, and might even go down, while padding their bank accounts on the results of his hard work. You don't want to do that. The fact is, there are a lot of people out there who want nothing more than a bunch more cogs for their machine, and get them with ease by playing to the values voting crowd, leading them like lambs to the slaughter.
I'll say, the major two parties are both full of problems, but I think, for each of us, we can figure out some candidate, be they major party or smaller party, that will suit our needs well enough to earn our vote. I also think it's important to understand how our political system works. Learn how the parties work, how the electoral votes are distributed, and what your vote actually does when it leaves your hands at the ballot box. This could sway you from choosing the best fit for you over all, to the best fit from one of the major parties, or the other way around. You absolutely must understand our political process before you vote. To do otherwise is to go off half cocked.
We have this cool thing called democracy here, but unfortunately, I see a lot of people just totally making a mess out of it because they simply don't know how to use it. My hope is that before this next election, people will educate themselves.
Also, don't vote for Mitt Romney. He big time sucks. <---- Opinion. But if you decide to heed it, I won't complain.
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