Thou shalt not get out.

I could swear I remember with lucid clarity, the day I took my oath of enlistment. I must have missed a part, though... you know, the line where it says, "Til death do us part". No, last I knew, there were three ways to get out of the Army, only one of which is to die. Of course, the other socially acceptable way out of the Army is to retire, but I'm pretty sure it's still totally legitimate to let your contract expire, and just not serve anymore. In fact, I'm 100% sure that deal is still going on since it has been as long as there's been an Army, and will until the end of time, and NOWHERE in the oath of enlistment or commissioning does it EVER say that you swear to stay in the Army forever.

I was told today that someone is sorry for me because my husband is getting out of the Army. Seriously? You're SORRY for me because my husband loves me and our kids enough to choose us over the Army? Back assward logic if I've ever heard it. No, please do not be sorry for me that I am married to someone who recognizes that he'll never get back the years spent away from us, and that three is two too many. On a more professional level, I'm glad he knows when to walk away. You have NO IDEA how many idiots I served with who were probably great soldiers 10 years ago, but just wouldn't walk away when it was time. I respect Thak for not wanting to become that, and for making sure he won't.

People forget that I got out of the Army, too, once upon a time. Is it hard getting set up in the real world after having everything handed to you by Uncle Sam for however long? Yeah, it definitely is, but I'll tell you one other thing. There is NOTHING hard enough to negate the feeling that comes with living FREE after being so much less free while serving in defense of the freedom of others. Freedom tastes a lot sweeter when you don't take it for granted, and no vet does. I guess that's something military wives who have never served know little about.

I'm happy for Thak to be getting out. I'm tired of people asking me how I can support that decision. I look at them like they have lost their minds. These people all know I used to be in the Army, but am not currently (and am not old enough to have retired), therefore it's not a huge leap in logic to see that I got out. Why wouldn't I want that for Thak, too? Why wouldn't I want him to be free? I DO want him to be free. It is my greatest wish for him. How could anyone who claims to love someone NOT support their goal of living their way? Wives who pressure their husbands into reenlisting, when it's so obvious that he's just done with it, really irk me. I say if you're so attached to your military benefits, go enlist. Let him get out if he wants to. Making someone stay in the Army for years after they should have gotten out does nobody any favors, not that person, not the people above and below them, not anybody. It makes everybody miserable.

I'm also sick of the assumption that I think it's going to be easy on the outside. If I have to hear one more horror story of life on the outside from some wife who's never served, and whose husband has never gotten out, I'm going to scream. I know first hand that it's not easy out there, that the things that are guaranteed to every military person, are hard-earned on the outside, but they can still be had. It's not like the military has a corner market on half decent pay, health insurance, and youth activities.

I get the feeling that a lot of people (who should know better!) are making the assumption that we're going about this blindly, and will make the common mistake of figuring the world will fall at our feet the day we leave post with Thak's discharge papers. I say they should know better because they KNOW I've opted out of a lot of activities because as we approach the year-mark, we're putting more money into savings than any other family we know. They should REALLY know better because everyone who knows me knows that Thak has been going to school at night for the past year, and has another year to go before he graduates. They KNOW he wasn't an ASE Certified mechanic this time last year, but he is now. If that's going about this blindly, then I must be nuts, because I surely don't see it that way.

Frankly, I don't know anybody who's put more thought into getting out than we have. We stayed in Savannah long enough for our son to be born there because we liked our birth center a lot, and then we had to move somewhere that would not have him deploying again, and the reason we turned down the Korea assignment we were offered is because we didn't see him being able to go to school in Korea, so as much as we'd have loved to live there for a couple years, it was impractical under the circumstances. We took the orders here because the unit wouldn't be deploying until after he got out, and it's a big enough city that they'd have schools he could choose from. One of the first things we did upon arrival here was to find Thak a school. We'd decided before leaving Georgia that when he got out of the Army, he would be a mechanic, so we already knew what we were looking for. Before he even officially reported to Ft. Bliss (basically, after we were out here, but while he was still on leave) we went around, visited schools, and got him enrolled at Western Tech. It was a gamble, but he was betting he could get command approval for it retroactively, so it was a gamble we were willing to take. As we approach his ETS from the Army and his graduation from school (the two dates are very close), we have done tons of research on what it's like on the outside for mechanics, or more accurately ASE Master Technicians, supervisors, shop leads, and other positions he's qualified for. I will say, a lot of what we've found is extremely hopeful. Depending where we end up, and what type of job he gets, we may actually see an INCREASE in total income. We've budgeted for a substantial decrease, but our research tells us that may not be what happens at all. Sounds good to me. His instructors at school tell him that he's the type who gets hired very quickly, and nobody in his school thinks he'll have ANY trouble finding a great job once he graduates (and they assist with job placement, so they know what they're talking about). There are scouts from dealerships that come to his school to find new employees, and they practically stalk him. If we were willing to stay here, he'd have 10 job offers by the end of the course. Hell, he already got one job offer the other day!! We're hardly being overly optimistic by thinking that Thak will find work on the outside.

I guess it just feels kind of like a big slap in the face when people who should know better act like we're being unrealistic to think that Thak can get out, that we can live a better life in the real world than we have been in the Army, and that we're unprepared. I dislike being told we're going to fall on our faces when we're working our asses off to make sure that doesn't happen. Our schedule is pure hell, and I don't know anybody else who does this, especially not for a couple years on end.

I'm not saying I'm 110% sure that nothing bad will ever happen to us on the outside. I cannot be totally sure of that, as I wholly lack the ability to predict the future. What I can say, though, is that we're giving ourselves the best chances, and even the senior NCO's and Officers tell Thak how smart he is to have such a solid plan. By this standard, I believe it is fair to say that we are anything but haphazard, that we're genuinely trying to prepare ourselves as best we can. I know tons of people who weren't half as prepared as we are, even now, who got out and did fine despite the rough start. Who is anyone to say we're setting ourselves up for failure? I don't usually do this because I'd really hate to be wrong about it, but I call jealousy. I think these individuals wish their husbands would do for them what Thak is doing for me, and they have to be mean and say ridiculous things to make themselves feel better. At the end of the day, though (and the end of the day is late around here...) we're doing better than most, and NOBODY can deny that without straight-up lying.