Ethnic vs Intentionally Misspelled

Naming. Does this controversy ever end for today's parents? No, I don't think it does. I'm all for uncommon names, to be honest. I cannot think of a single reason beyond family connection to name a kid a ridiculously common name like John or Jane. I also think anyone who chooses a name straight off the top 20 popular names list for any recent year, for any reason other than family connection, is a bit of a glutton for punishment. However, these ridiculously common names, or ridiculously trendy names aren't actually bad at all. The only thing that's truly bad, if you ask me, is an intentionally misspelled name. Name your kid whatever you want, but spell it right.

Here's the thing. If you use a "creative" spelling, everyone is going to spell the kid's name wrong as long as they live. They'll spend their entire life explaining that no, it isn't a typo. Some of these names that people come up with are not the super asinine forms that are ten miles long and full of g's, h's and ee's, but just have an extra letter thrown in or a single letter substitution, making them look even more like typos! Chloey, Willoe, Penelopie... These poor kids are going to spend their entire lives explaining that, yes, that really is how you spell it. Why do parents do this?

I was told recently that I'm no better for my next baby's Thai first name. I say that's an interesting assertion, but it's not the same thing. Someone with an ethnic name, when asked about it, has a simple response. In this case, he/she would just say, "It's a Thai name." and it'll make perfect sense since they're part Thai. That explanation is a hell of a lot better than, "My parents can't spell."

Sometimes, they way people go about naming their kids, I honestly wonder if some of them wouldn't have been better off to get a dog instead. You can name a dog anything you want, and they won't care. I don't think their doggy buddies will give them trouble over the weird-ass way their owner spelled Sparky (Spaerkeigh? Spaarkee?). A dog won't ever have to write this abomination on a campaign sign while running for public office, or put it at the top of a resume, or a medical school application. Studies show that applicants with messed up names aren't given as many opportunities as applicants with real names. A dog doesn't have that issue since they don't have jobs. So yeah, I seriously think it would be better for people who think intentional misspellings are valid naming options, to just get a dog until they get the misspelled name bug out of their system. The local animal shelter will surely thank you.