Boundaries.

Thak saw that I was extremely stressed. He asked me what was wrong, and I told him I just couldn't deal with these neighborhood kids. I don't LIKE random children. I don't like them running through my yard (even if they are lead by Erin). I don't like them knocking on my door and running away. I don't like them riling up my dog to the point that he snaps at them, and then having the audacity to cry and expect pity from me over it. I do not like them, not one bit.

This is not a daycare center. It is not a school. It is not a summer camp. It is not a drop off shelter. It is my home, and they are making me uncomfortable in my own home. That's just not ok.

We figured out that we're just going to have to set out very explicit boundaries... with Erin. She did great with obeying her boundaries today. She made it through a whole afternoon of playing outside, and she isn't grounded. She hasn't run out of the house after the older kids either. She stayed inside after we brought her in for the night. We're very pleased with her, in fact. Now we have to get her to take it one step further.

This is what we've figured out:

1) Front yard is fair game IF Erin is out there with them. I'm not having kids in my yard if mine isn't out there, but if she is, the front yard is the right place for that.

2) Stay out of the backyard. I can't have these kids running laps around my house. It drives me nuts.

3) Stay out of gardens.

4) No looking in windows.

5) No knocking on the door if Erin is already out there.

6) No random kids in the house.

7) No riling up the dog.

8) No kids in the garage. (No, really, that one is for safety. That's Thak's shop. Too many hazards for words.)


I think Erin has a pretty good understanding of these rules, and that she will impart them to her friends. It never occurred to me that we'd have to put down boundaries so explicitly. I thought it was common sense that you just don't run through other people's yards, or knock on people's doors, or look in windows, or anything like that. My kid doesn't do these things of her own accord. Sure, she'll follow others around doing whatever, but she would never just totally trample all over someone's property and think it was her god-given right. I guess it could also be that I grew up in a really rural area. There were no neighborhood kids. There was really no neighborhood. Sure, other people lived on our road, but it's not like you could see someone else's house from yours or something. Since that's my idea of normal, I get a little offended when these kids think they can just run all around my house, as if they own the place, when they weren't even invited to be here in the first place.

It's a matter of boundaries, though. These kids are probably used to just being able to run around like savages until someone tells them not to. So that's it. Erin's going to tell them not to. No kids in my backyard or my house unless they are invited guests (and a spur of the moment "invitation" by Erin doesn't count). I will no longer allow these brats to make me stressed and uncomfortable in my own home. I give my front yard as a peace offering, but my house and my backyard belong to me.