The local flavor:

So I'm starting to learn this neighborhood a little, people-wise. Here's what we've got so far:

Pee Wee Herman on Crack... This is a 5-year-old who lives very near us, and drives us absolutely nuts. The one time I let him in my house to play with Erin (actually, Erin let him in and I didn't kick him out) he locked himself in Erin's room, and then when he came out, he ate half a basket of fruit and emptied Orren's dresser. When his mother showed up looking for him I couldn't have been more pleased. Pee Wee, put simply, is a pain in the ass, and a ROYAL one at that. I feel kind of bad for the kid, though, because Erin's the only one in the neighborhood who doesn't tell him to get lost every time he comes out to play, so out of pity, I let him play with Erin.... just NOT in my house or yard. I'm not stupid. Plus, Frank hates him. Every time he says anything (and he's incredibly loud) Frank tries to run out and rip him to shreds. I've never seen my dog totally hate someone like he hates Pee Wee. He bit him the other day. We had to hang "Beware of Dog" signs.... because of Frank. (Well, really because of Pee Wee.) The good news is that Pee Wee is a temporary situation. His family is on orders, and he'll be out of here in probably a couple more months.

The Araboolies' White Trash Cousins... This is an entire family that lives behind us, kind of diagonal. They have about 100 kids, by the looks of it zero adults, and if there is such a thing as a negative number of rules, that's what they've got. These are, so far, the ONLY kids in the entire neighborhood whom Erin is absolutely forbidden from having anything to do with. I can't stand these brats. If there were a manual for parenting, the "don't" section would consist of a blow by blow account of whatever the assholes who raised this band of delinquents did for the past 10 or so years of their lives. These kids are the worst. They stand on top of the rock walls, essentially peeping in at everybody, they stay up until ridiculous hours even on school nights, and are incredibly loud. We find them on our ride-on toys, in our gardens, and they were the main ones leading the charge into our yard the day Thak set up the play structure. They are the reason we have to lock everything up. I have to run a white trash Arabooli off my property at least twice a week. I'm very mean to them, hoping that they'll get the point. We tell them every time they set foot in our yard to go away, that we're not their playground, and that they're not wanted here. Honestly, we're just really hoping their father (assuming they have one) comes down on orders REALLY soon.

The Motorcycle Gang... These are older kids. They're not necessarily bad, but I don't like Erin playing with them much, just because they are older and have a way different set of rules than Erin has. They ride through the neighborhood on those motorized scooters, but don't really get into anything. I've had to make it clear that they're not wanted in my yard (None of the kids are. It's my yard, not a public park.) but they're mostly fine.

And everyone else is completely normal!